I stole alot of food when i was a child

I grew up very poor in the 90's in North Atlanta i lived in one of the worst neighborhoods. I had barely enough to eat. Alot of the time i would steal food. I even went to prison for this. I stole from walmart and other stores. I only stole food. I wasnt mad at the world and my parents were mostly good parents. They worked alot and kept food in my mouth but the money was never enough. I i dont know i guess it was a safetly net for me. I remember when i was young i stole so much food i would eat until i would throw up. I also remember getting beat by my mom and dad for stealing but the next day i was so so so hungry tho. I stole so much food i would hide food under my bed. One of the first times i stole i was in middle school. I stole oranges and apples. I gave them to my friends also. I think this started a long lifetime habit. I remember when i was 16 i got in alot of trouble for this. I stole so much food from walmart i i dont even know how i got so much food out. I remember the first time i went to county jail. I got alot of charges for this. I got a huge fine and i spent alot of time in jail. I kept getting in trouble tho. I never cared. I had the attitude if you are going to hurt my feelings so much that i am barely able to eat i am going to hurt you back. I was never mean to the cashiers. I never tried to hurt anyone. I remember when i was 18 i got in even more trouble. I was stealing meat and alot of food. I stole so much food i would give it away. I would also give some to my mom. I would hide it in my backpack. I would also take alot of water bottles and fill them up in the bathrooms and carry them out. I was just trying to survive. Food is so expensive. I got put on probation. I got rearrested in 2012 for this. I spent another 60 days in jail. I also got my license suspended for not paying my fines. This was making life alot harder for me. How can i survive with no food. I had many jobs. I was working at a pizza place in atlanta when i got arrested. I got fired the day after i made bail. I got a huge bill of 1200 dollars. I got my license back but it took alot of i spent 3 months without a license. I remember when i was barely getting by. I stole food from grocery stores and i also stole food from my friends restaurants. I stole pizza. I stole chicken sandwiches. i stole safeway pizzas. I stole alot from subway. I worked at subway. I was also stealing food from there. I was eating so much i was gaining alot of weight. I think my alot of my actions were not me but my deep inner need to survive. I would also get so so so angry. When i was i kid i would get so mad. I think i had alot of pent up emotions. I also remember when i was 14 my house caught on fire. We got evicted i had to move into a shelter. We got our taxes back and moved into an apartment but in the meantime we were living in our van. I never told anyone that. We would sleep in the car. I never told anyone that. I remember when i was young i would get up when everyone was sleeping and i would walk to the gas station and buy candy. I always had candy. I remember when i would steal a small bag of candy and give it to my little brother. He was 2. He loves candy. I also had the attitude i was going to mess up the people who made me feel so hungry and poorly treated me. When i was 20 i got my shit together. I started working more and i started making better choices. I started to eat healthier. I started to take my mental health alot more serious. I started to do better. I started to think about how my actions might hurt people. I started to think of everything. I was also mad at the world. I dont know i i dont even know what made me mad. I think i was mad about not having any food. I think i was mad about alot of things. I think i was mad at my living situation. I was also mad that my mom and dad were so mean. I think my mom and dad didnt even know. I started to decide after that incident. My dad told me he didnt want to see me if i got rearrested. My mom told me the same thing. So that hurt my feelings so much but i decided to make better choices. I decided to stop stealing. I decided to move on with my life. I took a wage slave job. I worked my ass off. I also got alot of help from friends. They helped me. I think my deep inner need to survive made me mad. I think i was so so so hungry tho. I have been fine since tho. I have been fine the last 10 years. I have been working i have been seeing therapists. I recently got a much better job. I just got a raise. I make decent money now. I barely have to steal anything. I barely have to do anything now. I also started to see a therapist. I started to learn how to love myself. I started to learn why i was mad. I started to learn life was alot easier. I also started to learn how to own a house. I started to learn how to manage my finances. I started to learn how to pay alot of bills. I think life is alot easier now. I also got alot of help from my boyfriend. He is so so so kind. He also has helped me so much. He also helped me i dont even know how he made me not want to steal anymore. He also helped me. He took me to see a therapist. He also listened to me. I think i was hiding so many secrets. He also got my dad to talk to me. He also made me feel good. He also made me feel loved. I started to learn alot about food. I started to learn how to eat. I started to learn how to live healthier. I started to learn how to not eat so much processed food. I started to learn how to save money. I started to learn alot. I recently started to learn about money. I started to learn alot. I started to learn about food. I started to learn about life. I started to learn i dont need to steal. I started to learn i have alot. I also started to learn my parents love me. They just are barely making enough money. My dad is going to have surgery soon. My mom has been picking me up. My boyfriend has also been picking me up and taking me to work. My boyfriend has also been loving me. I think he really likes me. I think i am in love with him. I was so so so mad at the world tho. I think i am not mad anymore. I think i am happy. I am barely making enough money but i have alot. I have so much. I have a boyfriend. I have kinda good parents. I have alot. I also recently got a bonus. I also recently got a raise. I think i am going to be fine for awhile.