I paid my college tuition with stolen money

This is one of those confessions that I will take to my grave. I can’t tell anyone about this. Not even my therapist. I’m scared, I’m in shock and it’s a lot to process.<br><br>Throw Away Account. For obvious reasons.<br><br>I was recently accepted to the college of my dreams. I couldn’t believe it. I am the first person in my family to attend college. We’re not poor. We’re not rich, but we’re not poor either. My family owns a restaurant, they’re comfortably middle class. I am the youngest of 3. My parents are divorced. I don’t have the best relationship with my father. I only see him a few times a year. I don’t want to bad mouth him. All I can say is that he’s a complicated man. He’s married to someone else. He’s a lot older than my mom. He married her when she was 16 and he was in his 40’s. She divorced him when I was 2 and a half. My mom is amazing. I love her more than anything. She’s the reason I’m here today. My father in a way is the reason I’m here today. My mom remarried when I was 11. My dad cheated on my mom. She divorced him when I was 2 and a half years old. Despite all of this, I have a good relationship with my siblings. My brother is 34 and my oldest sister is 36. We’re a close family. <br><br>I want to preface this by saying my dad is not a good guy. He isn’t a nice person at all. He’s selfish. He’s an alcoholic. He’s a womanizer. One time he called me a bitch when I was 10. I can’t tell you everything about him because it’s too much for me to handle. My mom and I are Irish, my father is Arabic/Libyan. My parents relationship was a cultural one. My dad comes from a wealthy Middle Eastern country and my mom was from a poor European country. They met abroad. My mom was 16. My dad was in his early 40’s. He promised to marry her. And he did. They got married when my mom was 21 and my dad was in his late 40’s. He beat her, he cheated on her, he called her a bitch. My siblings and I were subjected to witnessing this. It was bad. My mom was smart, she got us out. My dad offered to pay child support. She denied it. She didn’t want a single dollar from him. And that’s that. <br><br>I don’t know if anyone has ever had to pay money for college. It’s expensive. I live in the US, Georgia specifically. My in state tuition was $6000. I pay more than that per year and my financial aid covered most of it. This year it did not. My mom couldn’t afford it. She told me not to worry about it and to take the bus home and said that I could come back once the situation got better. I was in shock. Why was I being punished for her mistakes? Why was I suffering for something I had no control over? I knew at that moment I had do something. I didn’t have many options. My father was my only hope. My grandma was dead. My grandpa was very sick. I couldn’t ask him. I had no one to ask. I was thinking about selling my car. I was thinking about getting a loan. But I knew that wouldn’t be enough. I needed at least 3 grand. And then it clicked. I remembered that my father had $25,000 in a bag. He said it was for him. He said it was his money. I knew no one would miss it. He’s wealthy enough. I just needed 3 grand. Of his 25 grand. But I was scared. I was so scared. He told me that if I stole from him he’d call the cops. I was a minor at the time, but I knew he wasn’t lying. I was a minor, but I knew he’d do it. I was a minor but I knew he’d call and the cops would arrest me and I’d get in trouble. But something inside of me told me to do it. Despite all of this. Despite the fear. Despite the anxiety.<br><br>I did it. I stole from him. I stole $3000 from him and I took that money and I used it to pay my tuition. And guess what? He didn’t even notice. He didn’t even know. And at that moment in time I felt free. I felt like I did something. I did something for myself. Despite everything. Despite the circumstances.<br><br>I’m scared. I’m scared he’ll notice. I’m scared he’ll see. I’m posting this here, because I can’t tell anyone. I can’t tell my mom. I can’t tell my friends. I can’t tell anyone. I just need to get this off my chest. And so here I am. I’m confessing. I stole money from my dad to pay for my college tuition. And I don’t feel bad. I’m scared. But I don’t feel bad.