I was a kid at the time, but my mom took me to the emergency room because I had "poked" myself with what she thought was a pencil. She was surprised to hear it was a needle/syringe.

This encounter happened years ago when I was a kid. I was less than 6 years old at the time and my mom was a heroin addict. <br><br>I have shaken this memory off for so many years and just finally realized it's actually kind of messed up.<br><br>I hadn't showered for days because I was too afraid to be alone in the bathroom. It was just my mom and me living together. She was always high, however she had a routine. She would open her bedroom door at around 3 am and I could smell the heroin it was so bad. She would try to take a shower at least, however she'd always come out black by her feet because she never cleaned the tub before showering. <br><br>I had to have the lights on everywhere, including the hallway leading to our apartment. If the lights went out, and I heard the front door rattle, I knew it was my mom coming home from the bar. <br><br>I finally got over my fear of the bathroom and took a shower. She was still passed out on the couch. I got out of the bathroom and was walking into the kitchen and it was out of the corner of my eye that I saw the door unsecured. I looked through the peephole and it was my mom. Her face was all scrunched up and she looked tired. I was so happy. <br><br><br>I opened the door and she tried to walk into the apartment but struggled. Her legs were weak and her arms were trembling. She was so drunk that she could barely stand up. I tried to help her but she fell on the floor and scraped her knees. She reached down and slapped my face. She then took out a syringe filled with heroin and started punching herself with it. I didn't understand what was happening. I thought she was hurting herself. I remember pulling on her shirt and asking her to please stop hurting herself. She started to cry out in pain and I didn't understand why. I remember feeling confused. <br><br>I looked at her hands and the syringe caused her to bleed, but she didn't stop. She started to feel dizzy as the heroin started to set in. I remember trying to help her to the couch and she eventually made it there without my help. She was so high she started to hallucinate. I didn't understand what was going on and was scared to death. I was a kid. <br><br>I looked at her hands and there was blood, but then I noticed she had poked a hole in her pants and there was something sticking there. I didn't know what it was so I grabbed it. It was a syringe. My mom had poked a whole in her pants with a syringe and didn't throw it out. <br><br>I didn't know what to do. I had never held a syringe/needle before. I looked at her and she was asleep, or at least passed out. I didn't know what to do so I pushed it in my pants and went to the bathroom. I remember feeling so confused and scared. I locked the bathroom door because I was afraid my mom would wake up and see me holding something in my pants that I didn't know what it was. I sat down on the toilet and kept looking at the syringe. <br><br>I didn't understand what it was, how it worked, or why my mom was allowed to hurt herself like that. I decided to figure out how it worked. I remember poking myself with the syringe and I started bleeding. I didn't know what was happening. It hurt so bad. I was confused and started to panic. I started to feel dizzy. <br><br>I ended up going to the emergency room because my mom thought I poked myself with a pencil. I was so lucky to be alive. I remember being on the hospital bed and being afraid to say what I did because I didn't want my mom to get in trouble. I didn't know if she would go to jail. The doctor ended up talking to me a lot and I told them what happened. They said it wasn't my fault and I didn't do anything wrong. They just said my mom needed to get help and that they would contact CPS because I was endangered by my environment. <br><br>If my mom hadn't been allowed to come home with me, who knows what would have happened. I would have been taken into protective custody and I would have never seen my mom again. I'm so glad my mom was given another chance. <br><br>CPS stepped in and got me away from her. I was placed in a better environment. I was able to go to school. My mom got help and has now been in recovery for 11 years. I'm so proud of her.