A Really Sweet Chinese Family Made Lunch For Me And Gave Me Hell About My Lack Of Cooking Knowledge.

I work as a residence advisor on my university’s campus. <br><br>I’m a Sr. RA which means I’m in charge of a hall that is mostly inhabited by freshman. We also have Chinese residence advisors in the building—a program set up by the university in which they accept Chinese international students in exchange for free housing.<br><br>I’m the only westerner on campus, so my Chinese skills are basically non-existent, but I’m getting better at sign language. The Chinese RAs are mostly flipped from what I’m used to—that is, they’re mostly English proficient, but the first year Chinese students are mostly not.<br><br>I was working Monday and they brought the mostly Chinese food and began to eat. They asked me if I wanted food, but I had brought a PB and banana sandwich so politely declined. I think they saw the sandwich and were horrified. They asked what the sandwich consisted of and I told them and they all laughed at how plain it was. They asked if I could cook, and I asked if instant noodles counted, but they said no. Then I said I could boil water and fry an egg, and they all collectively gasped. This was when one of the ladies took out a phone and in perfect English asked, “That is no problem, we will make you lunch.” <br><br>And they did. All of them. It was like a well-oiled machine in which everyone had a job. This was when one of the younger ones brought out what looked like a small cucumber and ask if I could peel it. I stared at it in horror. What is this? How am I supposed to peel it? Teach me your ways. Then the ever so sweet lady took it from me and picked a vegetable peeler up from behind her and did it for me. <br><br>After that, they all giggled and asked if I could wash dishes, which I said yes, and they passed me a small mountain of dishes. Another younger one looked at me with a cocked eyebrow and put a sponge in my hand and then put his hand on top of mine and scrubbed. They all laughed again. <br><br>I was mortified. I don’t know if they have actually ever witnessed someone who couldn’t do these things, but they all seemed to be leaning towards yes. I’m 22. I can’t even boil water? I think they were shocked, but also amussed and maybe a little sad when they saw that I was embarrassed. I think the overall sentiment was pity and not anger in any way. <br><br>I was given a mostly egg and rice dish with some bouts of vegetables. It was absolutely delicious. I was then given a pot of tea which consisted of an assortment of herbs that I couldn’t pronounce. They also gave me two cookies shaped like animals which we’re delicious but also adorable. <br><br>All of this had transpired in about an hour and a half. <br><br>I took the food back to my office and dug in. Who even knew tea could be so tasty? We’re going to have to step up our game in the west. I don’t even like tea, but this was damn good. <br><br>I ate the food in two bites, because I was so damn hungry. Then I looked at the cookies and through one in my mouth without even checking them out. Once I had bitten into the first cookie I realized they were so elaborately decorated. <br><br>I took a picture of it and send it to the lady from earlier, writing, “This was delicious, but now I feel like a monster!!” <br><br>She laughed and said it was cute and that in China they have a saying, “When you eat something, you must eat the inside and the outside. So you are just doing as you are supposed to do.” <br><br>I asked if that was true and she said no, but she thought it sounded cute. <br><br>Anyway, that’s my story. I had my ass kicked in bouts of cooking. It was delicious though. I’m going to have to go back to western cooking school, though.