I'm 30 and never had a friend in my life. This is a nightmare.

I cried for a while. I got sober years ago and was never popular, I can't even get a girlfriend at 30 years old. I had one friend briefly that went away. I have never had a "friend" in my life, my Granny that passed away when I was 17 was my only friend. All the boys used to bully me at school, they said I was gay, ugly, made fun of my teeth. I was so poor I couldn't even afford lunch money. <br><br>I feel sick to my stomach. Debo is probably the only celebrity that truly understands me. How can this be my life? How did I end up here? How did I make it to 30 years old without one friend? What's wrong with me? <br><br>I'm so sorry this is so long, I needed to open up.