Just lost my best friend.

My best friend died.<br><br>He was the last person in my life who I felt really cared about me, and I really cared about him.<br><br>I have no family, no friends, and now I am alone. I'm scared for the first time in my life.<br><br>His wife asked me to be in the funeral procession, so I'm going to hold it together for her. But tonight, I don't think I can.<br><br>I am alone now. And I am scared. <br><br>Why the fuck did he have to go? I was his best friend, and even that wasn't enough. <br><br>I hate this, I hate this. Why me.<br><br>Fuck.