What just happened?

Warning: I did a major edit to take out the stuff I said. I know this is the internet and once you post it, it's always out there, but I feel like I said too much. <br>I just started seeing some guy I met on Bumble. We made it very very very clear to each other that we were both looking for a relationship. We both made it very very very clear to each other that we both have been hurt very badly in the past (I'll get to that in a minute). And we both made it VERY VERY VERY clear we weren't going to play any games with each other and were going to communicate as honestly and openly as we possibly could. I'll spare you the details of our many conversations about all of this. <br>We got involved fast, as people do when they are looking for a relationship. We'd message each other all day, every day, and talk on the phone every night. We were going on a few dates every week. We'd have sex, but not a ton. We'd still had a ton to talk about on the dates, do I didn't feel like it was just about that. We'd cuddle and he'd give me gifts and it felt like he was really falling for me, and vice versa. <br><br>We did have a major disagreement a few weeks ago, but we had talked it out and I thought it was over. I'm talking about a disagreement in general, not just about this subject, but it was the topic of that disagreement. <br>In short, I'd told him that I had cheated on my ex. I'd only been with two people before him, my HS boyfriend and my college boyfriend. I cheated on my college boyfriend for a year and a half with a different guy I met through Bumble. I told him this. No harm, no foul, I'd been young and dumb and I admitted that so it isn't a big deal, right? Wrong. <br>He got so pissed at me when I told him this. He told me he had never met a woman that cheated on her man like that. He told me that made him question if I'd do it to me. I had to promise him that I hadn't been with anyone else since we'd met. I told him the same story as to why I cheated. I was very young, I didn't know what I was doing, I was still figuring some things out. He seemed to get it. We moved past it. But then he'd bring it up again when he was pissed at me. He'd bring it up when he was stressed. He'd bring it up when he was angry at himself. He'd bring it up when he was angry at the world. He'd constantly make jokes about me cheating on him. He'd just say it jokingly, but then he'd realize he wasn't joking and get mad at me. It was causing so much tension in the relationship that I was getting ready to break up with him because of it. I told him that, by the way. I told him I couldn't be in a relationship where that's how he reacted to any little thing. He said he'd let it go. He said I'd hurt him so bad by telling him that. He said he'd never met a woman who cheated like that before and it was so hard for him to not see me as that girl forever. But he said he understood, and we moved forward. <br><br>Then, about a month ago, I learned something about him I didn't know before. He cheated on his ex wife. And not just a little. For two years. With many different women. He lied to her and told her he was working late when he was with them. He told her he was traveling for work when he was with them. He'd go on their vacations with them. He said he'd take his wife on a romantic getaway, and instead go with them to spend the weekend in a hotel alone with him. He lied to her about not wanting kids because he didn't want to have kids, when in reality he didn't want to trap her with him. He wanted her to be able to leave him if she wanted to. He told her he was broken after his mother passed away when in reality he was broken because of all the guilt he felt from cheating. He'd tell her he was in therapy, which was true, but not why he was in therapy. He'd tell her he wasn't happy in their marriage and didn't know why, when in reality he just didn't want to be married to her anymore. And when she found out, he begged her to stay with him and even offered to keep her as his wife but make her his poly wife so he could still see the women he wanted to see. And when she said no, he cried about it because he felt guilty and lost. And when she left him for good, he was broken. His friends and family hated him. He was alone and he felt like he deserved it. <br><br>That was a few years ago. Before we met. But since we met, he's been lying to me too. He's been lying to me for months. And I just learned that tonight. <br><br>Why did he lie so much to his ex? He was afraid if he told her the truth, that she'd leave him. And he couldn't handle being alone, even though he knew he was a bad husband and didn't deserve her. He'd rather be in a happy marriage with a woman who loved him than be alone. Why did he lie to me? Because he was afraid that if he told me the truth, I'd leave him. I'd realize I was too good for him and I deserved better than a man like him. And he couldn't handle being alone again, even if it meant he was getting what he deserved. <br><br>I don't know what to do. Do I give him another chance? He told me he's going to be honest with me from now on. But he told me that before. And his ex thought he was being honest with her too, at least for a while. I know there's no excuse for cheating. And I know that cheating is so much more than "just a kiss" or "just a little lie". But what should I do? I don't know.