ELI5 how do I get my wife to love sex?

**Edit: Everyone, thank you for the support and advice. I took off of work today and sat her down. Turns out I was spot on with the PMS theory. She was so sweet and apologetic and we had a long talk about how I feel. I told her I was only upset bc I missed our connection, but I understood she needed time to herself. She had a 2 week work project that ended on Friday, and I could just tell the stress was really getting to her. I moved things around in my schedule, and I was able to give her a wine and dinner date night last night. We had a wonderful time. It may have been the absinthe talking but we had sex 4 times in a row to do it again when we woke up. Seriously, I think she was just PMSing and needed to take things easier at home. I'm just happy to have my wife and best friend back** <br><br>**Edit 2: The absinthe did it y'all lol**<br><br><br>This is very very embarrassing for me to post but last resort. I'm losing my mind. I've talked to her, asked for advice from others and tried many things and I just don't know what else to do. <br><br>My wife of 4 years used to LOVE having sex. She'd initiate, make plans to have sex, take me to a store to buy a toy just for her pleasure...She's always been very communicative. We've always had a great connection and has never indicated to me that I don't please her or hurt her. I've always received positive feedback and made sure throughout she is the main priority and enjoying herself. <br><br>We've been together almost 11 years and we were very sexually active all the time. In fact, she had a higher sex drive than me and always wanted to have sex at least twice a day. About 4 months ago she started saying she was too tired and initiated sex less. I started initiating more but she'd always say no and maybe we'd do it once a week. She'd always say she was too tired and we have a 2 year old so I get it. I've asked her multiple times if she was happy and if there was anything wrong in our relationship. I've done everything to make sure she knows I love her and she matters. I've made multiple romantic gestures, helped with the baby more, took her away for a weekend, bought her flowers, cooked, etc. I don't think it's me. <br><br>It got to the point where she'd maybe have sex once or twice a month. I'd ask her what's wrong, if I did something, if she still finds me attractive...She said none if that and maybe she just doesn't want to have sex as much bc she's got a lot on her plate with work and the baby. I get it, I used to feel that way too. <br><br>But now she's started to not even hug me or give me any affection. She won't kiss me and she seems over me sexually and emotionally. I've tried to initiate sex more and get declined every time. I've asked her to watch a sex tape, look at a sex shop with me, go to a class (we've done this multiple times before and it always got us in the mood and excited to try new things) <br><br>I've tried to be more gentle, I've tried being more rough. I've let her pick what toy, what position, what movie, what music and how long. Nothing works. She might reluctantly say yes but she will never initiate. We've always been a connected couple. We would have sex and then cuddle afterwards and talk or watch a movie together. Now she's just doing all that alone and by herself. It feels like I'm losing my wife and she doesn't love me anymore.