New teacher here, and I just had my first IEP meeting...it didn't go great.

Throwaway account because I am in a small district. I'm a new teacher here and I had my first IEP meeting last night. I'm still getting used to our IEP procedure and I wanted to do everything right for these parents. You see this child has a diagnosis of autism, and I hear that parents WANTED to have their kid diagnosed so they can get accommodations. BUT I DON'T CARE WHAT THE KID NEEDS! The kid needs extra help so I made sure that was so cut and dry in the IEP, that the kid would get every accommodation they possibly could need or want for the next two years. Well the parents don't like having a diagnosis of autism, they want instead a diagnosis of ADHD, because they would rather have their kid labeled with ADHD than have their kid labeled with autism. EVEN THOUGH THE KID DOESN'T HAVE ADHD, they specifically said they wanted their kid labeled with ADHD because of the stigma that autism has. so I told them no, because it is unjust to label a child with something they don't have. So the parents asked me what kind of other labels we could give the kid to make it sound better. I told them that we could label the kid with a processing disorder, because even though the kid doesn't have a processing disorder, it sounds better than having a label of autism. So they said to me, "would a label of autism be allowed if we specified what part of the spectrum the kid is on?" I told them no, because if we say the kid is on the mild end of the spectrum, it is unjust to label the kid with something they don't have. So then they asked, "what other labels could we give the kid?" So I asked "are you asking me to label the kid with something they do not have?" They answered "yes, we don't want the kid to have a label of autism." So I told them no. You can't just give a kid a diagnosis that they do not have, that is wrong. UNLESS, the kid needs something to function. Now I know that this kid would not function without their accommodations, and I so badly wanted to give them anything they needed to succeed. So I told the parents that I would label the kid with something they don't have, if it meant the kid would get the help they need. So they asked me, "what labels could we give the kid?" I answered "speech, occupational therapy, physical therapy, processing disorder, ADHD, dyslexia, dyscalculia, dysgraphia." So they said "I think we will go with the last one, dysgraphia." Even though the kid has no problem writing, I put the label on the IEP and the parents were happy. It was such a relief for me to make sure this kid got the right diagnosis and accommodations that they needed. And it was nice for the parents to not give the kid a label of autism. I'm so glad this meeting went so well.