My theory about the origin of the universe

Before the big bang, there was a universe much like ours. A massive solar system existed. One of the planets had life. An advanced civilization. These aliens invented the big bang generator. They built it on one of the gas giants. It exploded the planet, sending the aliens in all directions. An asteroid pummeled into space. It wasn’t an asteroid. It was the astroid from 2013. It entered the orbit of the sun. It was sucked in and blew up, sending it to the next sun. It continued to travel like this. Until one day it exploded in a massive ball of fire. It hit the aliens and sent them to earth. There was one casualty on the way. It was the saturn moon that was destroyed by the asteroid. (I forgot its name, it’s 4 letters, but I think it’s dione, but its not dione, I’m sure it’s titan, but I know it’s not titan). The aliens survived. They found humanoid and figured they would look like that. They figured humans would be afraid of them because of how different they looked. Because they knew how they would react if aliens showed up. They built a massive generation ship. They flew it to earth. On the way, they created the Oort cloud, a layer of stuff created by them to block out comets. They got to earth. Before they could enter the atmosphere, they set off a massive bomb. It threw earth into orbit. They created the other planets. They created the moon. They created the rings of saturn. They got to earth. They created the flora and fauna. They created the humans. They took a poll. The aliens asked themselves, “what do you think humans will like the most?” 51% answered, “we should create cheese” The other 49% answered, “we should create pornography” The aliens decided to go with the majority. They created cheese. They put it on earth. The aliens got bored with waiting for humans to evolve, so they decided to make it faster. They created cities and buildings. They didn’t get bored for a few billion years while waiting for humans to evolve. They left the cities and buildings on earth. The humans found the cities and ran into the aliens. The humans asked them, “what are you doing?” The aliens responded, “I’m watching porn” Humans were very confused. They brought the humans to the generation ship. They showed them what porn was. The humans asked, “is that what you use to create life?” The aliens said yes. The humans said, “we don’t need porn. We can just fuck” The aliens were confused. They asked, “what the fuck?” The humans explained sex to them. The aliens were shocked. They had no idea. They realized they had wasted 10 billion years of pornography when they could be having sex. They were pissed. They asked the humans, “will you let us have sex with you?” The humans agreed. From that day on, the humans and aliens had sex. It was fun. 7 billion years later, we are here. Now the humans and aliens are having sex. It is fun. 7 billion years later, we will make new aliens. The humans will leave the earth and travel to another galaxy. They will have sex with the aliens there. They will create new humans and aliens. They will travel to new galaxies. At some point, the humans will reach a point where they are so evolved that they will reach a higher form of life. Like gods. The humans will travel to other universes. They will come to the universe we started in. They will create the aliens. They will create the big bang generator. They will create the universe and time. This will cause the end of time and space. It will be the end of existence.