I've recently found my other half. And its my daughter.

So this may seem unusual, so im sorry if I'm doing this wrong. But I had no one else to talk about it and I have nowhere else to go to say what I need to say, (My friends would think its gross). And I think you'll understand if you read what I have to say.<br><br>So I have a daughter, who is now 21. For most of my life I was... not the best dad. I looked after myself and was more into my career than my family. And that is the biggest regret of my life. I shut myself up in my room at home and started drinking. And when I came out of my room, my daughter had left for university. I was sad but I took the opportunity to clean up my act. I got sober, and started going to the gym. I have gotten in much better shape and I feel like a much better person after doing so. I live by myself in that house now, and it feels extremely empty.<br><br>Last time I saw my daughter was at christmas. I was a little nervous, I havent seen her in years, I have a feeling she would think of me badly, and I would have done to if I was in her position. So I was afraid she would think badly of me. But when she came through the door, she came straight to me and hugged me. She said she was happy to see me and that I looked good. I was able to relax then and it felt like the weight had been lifted. I have not felt that happy in years. We talked, and I found out she is doing well, and I was proud. She is doing everything I should have done and more, and it was nice to see that.<br><br>We only spent a day together though and now I miss her more than ever. But when I message her, she does talk to me. She seems happy to talk to me and we have been getting along well. But I couldnt help but feel different about her this time. I felt different about her at christmas, and although I know it is gross, I couldnt help it. I was seeing her in a different light. I would never do anything with her, so it is ok to think that right? I know it is gross but I also think its normal. I cant help that I love my daughter. I have no family other than her. I am old now, and do not want a wife. And I am happy just to have my daughter. I am thinking maybe we can watch a movie together and then we can just cuddle up and maybe kiss or something. Although I know it is wrong I think its ok because we are just showing each other love. I have been thinking about that a lot lately and I think thats what I want.