AITA for exposing my son's behavior to my DIL

I apologize if this is too long, I tend to ramble when I am upset. My son Charles is 23 and is my only child. I always got along well with his ex-wives, and actively stayed in contact with them after the divorce. My wife says I am too much of an enabler, and that I can't help myself when I care for people. My son and I have always been close, we share a lot of the same interests, and I do my best to always support him. <br><br>I always hoped that he would find someone that he could have a long-lasting marriage with, when he married his current wife Dianne three years ago I thought that things might finally work out for him. She is very intelligent, and ambitious, and she seemed to really like my wife and I. My wife and I were fairly close with Dianne, just like we were with his ex-wives. She even asked my wife if she would help her with wedding planning.<br><br>Five months ago, she started making some changes, and became more informal with us. She'd often call my wife by her first name without the honorifics, and would get upset if we didn't acknowledge her corrections. We thought she was just going through a phase, and that it would blow over. After all she did go through a lot the past two years, and I figured she maybe just needed to express herself. When Charles told her that she was being too informal, she started crying and accused him of being sexist. <br><br>I was shocked that he hadn't already spoken to her about her behavior, and I told him that he should have addressed it earlier. When he told her that she could talk to me, she just called me a sexist too, and accused me of teaching him that women were inferior. My son told me that he'd handle it, but he didn't do anything, and just let her be childish. <br><br>She started to get more belligerent, and would berate Charles and insult him. She'd often try to make him cry, and humiliate him. It was so hard to watch, and all he would do is apologize to her. I saw how much this was tearing him down, and I felt so awful seeing him treated like this. I confronted her, and told her that she is being abusive and manipulative. She told me that she'd just been provoked, but when Charles told her she hadn't, she went on another rant calling him weak for not protecting her, and that he should stand up for her honor. <br><br>I had to take my wife somewhere, but I came back and my son was crying. He told me that Dianne had yelled at him, and berated him for not standing up for her, and that if he wasn't going to protect her he should just leave her alone. He told me that he didn't know what to do, and that he just wanted to get away from her. I asked him why he hadn't left her, and he said that he felt bad for leaving another marriage. <br><br>I told him that he was making excuses, and that she was emotionally abusing him. Dianne came back, and told me to mind my own business. My son started crying again, and she accused him of making her look bad, and that he should just get out. I suggested that we stay at a hotel, and that she should go to her parents. She started throwing things, and I called the police, and reported her for being violent. She started calling my son and I bigots, and racist. The police came and took her to her parents.<br><br>I can't believe my son married someone like her. I kept telling him that it was OK to leave, and that it was better to leave than to deal with this abuse. When we got back to the hotel, he told me that she was starting to act weird before they even got married. That she'd go into tirades, and accuse him of being a sexist when he'd disagree with her, that she'd attack anyone that disagreed with her feminist opinions. I asked him why he didn't leave her, and he said that he thought that she'd stop being as clingy, and less sensitive once they were married. <br><br>I was so angry that he wasn't honest with me about what happened. I told him that he should have told me about what happened, and he told me that he was embarrassed that he didn't stand up for himself sooner. I told him that he wasn't to blame, and that he doesn't have to hide anything like that. We couldn't get a hold of anyone that could bail her out, so we stayed at the hotel, and went to the police station the next day. The police told us that she'd been let out on probation, and we should keep her away from my son. <br><br>We spent the rest of the day just relaxing, and trying to get away from everything. We went out to eat dinner, and we were working on getting her out of the house. We got back to our house and my wife told me that her parents came over. They told my wife that Dianne had called them, and that she'd been abused, and that I was an awful father for not taking care of my son. My wife tried to explain that Dianne had been abusive, and that we were trying to protect our son, but they just got angry that she was defending me. <br><br>On the drive back to my son's house Dianne's parents called, and they started berating me for not respecting my son's wishes that I stay out of it. I told them that I can't let my son be hurt, and that she is abusive. They started calling me sexist, and that if I loved my son I'd stand by him, and that I should stay out of his marriage. We came home, and they were in the living room, and Dianne was there. <br><br>She told my son that she'd forgive him if he groveled, and did what she said. My son told her no, and she accused him of being abusive. She started going on a rant about how pious she was, and that she was the only pure one in the marriage. Her parents stood by and defended her. Then my son started opening up about everything, and how much she had hurt him. She cried, and her parents started attacking my son. My wife stepped in and told them off, and that they needed to mind their own business. <br><br>Dianne's parents left, and they called their Lawyers. Dianne's father has a lot of connections, and he's very wealthy, and I don't know what is going to happen. My wife and I are afraid of a lawsuit, but we will do whatever it takes to protect our son. <br><br>Edit: I apologize for not answering all the questions, I've always been a slow responder, and I am honestly overwhelmed by all the support I have gotten. <br><br>When my son's ex-wives divorced him, they divorced amicably, and we all stayed friends. There was no conflict in either of their marriages, and everyone got along well. We've always been honest about our opinions, and we have always been on the same page as the ex-wives. My wife and I are very strong on traditional values like chivalry, and respect, and we've always encouraged our son to treat his partners the way he would want to be treated in return. I've always been easy going, and have just rolled with things until they got out of hand, and my son just wanted to avoid confrontation. <br><br>My wife and I are in our 40s, and we both are still working. We are fairly well off, but we aren't wealthy. My son and Dianne live in a different state, and we aren't close to them. We are willing to help him in any way we can though, and we will do whatever it takes to support him. We will stay with him as long as we can, and we will help him get back on his feet, and if Dianne sues we will take that as it comes. Right now we are just focusing on getting my son the support he needs after this abuse.