my dad had been living in my grandparents house after they had passed away but he decided to buy a new house which meant clearing out my grandparents house. he has either never thrown away anything or hasn’t cleaned for the last 20 years

my grandparents lived in possibly the smallest house i’ve ever been in. its literally 2 bedrooms a kitchen and a bathroom. it was a bungalow compared to some houses where you need a map just to navigate the place. but some how my dad still managed to find a way to hoard. <br><br>first of all he hadn’t cleaned the house since god knows when, there was thick dust on everything and cobwebs in every corner, it almost seemed as though the house had been left to rot and the dust and decay was taking over. you can’t tell anyone has been living there for years. he never threw anything out, he had 3 entire cupboards filled with empty tin cans which had been used YEARS ago. there was literally enough to fill a whole recycling bin possibly even 2 or 3. he had items in there that were expired over 20 years old that he had never thrown out. why he hadn’t thrown these away is beyond me and i’m sure no one will ever know. it was honestly like he had never thrown anything away since my grandparents had passed. after he moved out there was still so much left in the house. he had old electronics, empty cans and bottles, wrapping paper, photocopies of documentation, plastic tubs, even thing my brother and i used as kids.<br><br>i took 3 entire refuse sacks of stuff out and put it in my car and took it to the tip, turned out i had put 99.9% of it in the recycling bin and didn’t even need to put anything in the trash. it looked like the house had been left for decades. for years i felt like i was being a nag by always telling him to throw stuff away and either tidy up or throw it away. i genuinely would tell him about once a month and he never listened. but seeing how much stuff was in the house i can see why he didn’t bother. i didn’t even want to put my hands on anything because it was so dirty. it almost felt like my grandparents had never been there and it was my dads all along. why he never bothered to clean any of it either is beyond me. <br><br>he didn't even want to throw anything away when i came through some of the kitchen cupboards and showed him there were perfectly good pots and plates but the lids and things were missing so they were useless. he didn't want to throw anything away. he kept asking me to take some of it to my house which i didn't want to. i think he gave one of my old cups to my mum, i don't know how many other things he's given people but i think he gave all the plates i used as a kid to my sister too. which i think is ridiculous. i spent hours everyday over the last week going through some of his belongings and sorting out what was trash, what was recyclable and what he could keep and it still wasn't enough.<br><br>i probably spent hours a day for several days just digging through the house and as much as i tried to get through everything i just couldn't. it was a mess. i can't fathom how he let it get that bad. my grandmas house was so clean and tidy before and she always wanted it that way. she never liked mess or dirt. i can't imagine her seeing the state of the house in the state it was in. <br><br>i have no idea how he would have ever got through it all on his own. i had to break it to him gently that there was no way he was going to be able to get through it all by himself and it was best to ask for help. there was so much stuff everywhere i would have needed to spend nights at the house just to get through it all. <br><br>it still had a lot of my grandparents belongings in it, all of their photo albums which they would take everywhere with them. stuff like that is priceless. you can’t buy that sort of sentimental value, you can’t replace it, you can’t have that sort of thing again, it’s just impossible. i think there was even baby photos of my dad and his siblings. he didn’t seem to care about any of that. he might as well have just thrown them away. <br><br>i just want my dad to realise that he doesn’t need to keep everything. i don’t know if he realises it but he has an entire wardrobe full of empty hangers. he only ever gets new clothes at christmas. he doesn’t even buy clothes for himself, my grandma would always either buy them or make them for him. he doesn’t even need to buy clothes anymore. he still has clothes from when he was younger that he never wears. he still has my grandmas wedding dress in one of his cupboards. <br><br>i don’t know what he wants to do with it, he certainly doesn’t take care of it but he won’t get rid of it either. but it’s still sat there hanging in the exact same spot he put it all those years ago. i don’t want to live in a dirty house, he shouldn’t want to live in a dirty house. they would have hated living somewhere so dirty and the way it looked. <br><br>i wish he would consider the way he’s acting and the way he’s living and how it affects him but i think he’s too stubborn to realise now. i don’t think he’ll change now. i just think he will keep living in his mess for the rest of his life.