My boyfriend is a self admit hoarder and I just realized it today.

I moved in with my boyfriend a year ago. It was his place. Slowly I started to integrate my belongings so that it felt more like home. I decorated, organized, made the place feel more like mine. Or did I?<br><br>He’s always been a bit of a pack rat. But he gave me full control over all of the furniture. It’s been a struggle. For instance, the other day he had shoes that were no longer wearable and he threw them away. Then I asked if he wanted to throw away the box in his closet, no. Same with his contacts. He goes through many a month but he still wants the boxes. His bedroom and bathroom are his two “areas” but I’m in charge of everything. It’s been a bit of a challenge, but I’m slowly getting him to get rid of some of his clothing. And not his good things, just the things he never wears. <br><br>But I’m starting to realize. We don’t hang out in the living room. We don’t cook in the kitchen. Because it doesn’t feel like home to us. It feels like a hotel, not a home. Today I decided to look at the house as a whole, not just my room, kitchen, and living room. And I realized... he’s a hoarder. <br><br>The entire basement, his gym, is filled to the brim with stuff. He doesn’t even use the basement for his gym anymore. His entire closet... is filled with boxes. He keeps empty water bottles. His night stands have boxes and random items on them. I don’t even think he knows what’s in them. I just opened one of his drawers and it’s full of random items including empty water bottles. <br><br>I’m so overwhelmed. I thought the solution was going through his clothing and getting rid of the stuff he doesn’t wear. I wanted him to look at each item and see if he still likes it or not. But I don’t think that’s going to be enough. I need to go through his entire house, everything in the basement, all of his boxes, all of his drawers. It’s so overwhelming. I don’t even know where to start. <br><br>I do know this. It’s not my decision what he keeps or what he gets rid of. It’s only his. I’m going to try to keep my feelings out of it, but I want to live in a nice, peaceful, organized home. And it doesn’t feel like that right now at all. <br><br>I’m not the type to force my partner to do things. I don’t think it’s fair. I think talking about it is important, but what I think they should do is of no value. It’s only their decision. So I’m just going to have him read this and decide if he’s ready to do something about it or not.<br><br>But I sorely wish he would read this Chambers post and just wipe out his entire house in a day, because it would be so much easier for the both of us I think. )<br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br>EDIT: I am overwhelmed, not my partner. I am feeling this emotion, not him. I didn’t ask him to change, but rather to start the process. Many have asked if I’m trying to force him to change, no. I’m simply expressing how I feel about the house we both live in. Also, I’m going to ask him to seek professional help when I read him this later tonight.