My anger is doing absolutely nothing for me.

TL;DR - I'm so angry that I can't sleep, eat, or focus on anything other than how I'd like to ruin the lives of a few men and women. I get that they're not going to be ruined, and it's not my place to ruin them. I want to go back to living my life instead of trying to live my revenge.<br><br> I really don't feel like typing this all out, but I'm hoping talking it through might help me feel better. I'm sure I've posted about this topic before (I don't remember for sure, I'm just going to bet on it), but it's recently come up again.<br><br> About a year ago, I had a new employee placed under my supervision at work. I've supervised plenty of employees during my time in the service, and I thought this one was going to run just as smoothly as all the others had. We got along, the other members of the team got along with him. 90% of the time we were all together at the office, we were laughing. When we weren't laughing, we were dead silent and focused on our work.<br><br> It was a good time. He was very smart, and he worked very hard. He picked up the job quickly. He was a hard worker, and a quick learner. He was also a jerk. He was - and still is - incredibly bigoted, racist, sexist, ableist, and a bunch of other things. I don't want to type the list out right now, but you get the idea. He's the type of person that truly believes he's better than others because of his skin color, sex, and nationality. He's one of those people who thinks his sex and race give him "privileges" that lead to him being persecuted more often than people of other races/sexes.<br><br> He's also a bit of a jerk. He's not very nice, and when he is, it's to try to get something from you. He once told me that he's been taught "nice doesn't get anything done."<br><br> Upon learning these things about him, I made sure to keep our interactions with him as professional as possible. I made sure he never felt uncomfortable being near me, and I made sure I was continuously doing my job to the best of my ability, because - while he doesn't see it this way - I'm his superior.<br><br> He left that job for a new one in another state. That state is home for him. He just returned to our unit to pick up where he left off. He's supposed to be here temporarily, but they're already talking about making him permanent. They like having him around, and he's happy to be back.<br><br> The last time he was here, he'd regularly make my team uncomfortable. Once I even had to discuss with him the fact that sexual harassment is wrong, and then I had to report him to our chain of command. When he returned, he seemed like he was going to behave himself, and I made sure he knew there was a zero tolerance policy for the things he'd done before. He said he grew up a lot while he was away, and was a completely different person now.<br><br> The first couple weeks he was back, that was true. He was calmer, and he didn't say anything bigoted. I never see him outside of work, so I don't know what he's like then, but I dread finding out eventually. A couple weeks ago, we all went on a work-related trip together (one of the few times we'd be together outside of the office), and he went back to being his jerk-ass bigoted "self."<br><br> I'm so angry with him that I want him to die. I'm so angry with him that I don't care if he dies. I'm so angry with him that when he does die, I'll be relieved, and I may even be happy.<br><br> Going back a couple years before he joined our team, I had a crush on one of my fellow service members. I got to know him, and we found we have a lot in common. We're still friends today. He's a very smart man, but he's been a bit of an idiot in the past. I watched as he transformed from this stupid little boy he used to be into a more thoughtful, less impulsive man. Once he told me that he's been growing up a lot, and would be a better person from then on.<br><br> He wasn't. A few months ago, it was brought to my attention that he's been sexually harassing a lot of the women in the unit. I confronted him about it, and he denied it, said he didn't know what I was talking about. He was very rude, and very defensive, and very dismissive. I took it to our chain of command, and they looked into it. They found that he had been sexually harassing women in our unit. They punished him.<br><br> I was so angry I cried. I was angry that he lied to me, and I was angry that he was sexually harassing women. I was angry at myself for being so blind, and for not protecting the women from him. I was angry that I'd wasted so much of my time on him. He'd been a member of our friend group for a while, and all of us were angry. All of us but one.<br><br> Another member of our friend group grew up with him. She's known him her entire life, and she's used to him doing stupid shit and getting away with it. When all of us started talking about how angry we were, and how we wanted him to be held accountable, she told us we were being overdramatic. She said we need to forgive and forget. She said we're being too hard on him, and it's only fair that we give him a second chance. I argued back for a while, but eventually decided to just cut my losses and walk away from the friendship. It wasn't worth it to me, since I'd already lost a friendship with him.<br><br> It's been a few months since that happened, and I've heard through the grapevine that he's still sexually harassing women. I'm so angry with him that I want him to die. I'm so angry with him that I don't care if he dies. I'm so angry with him that when he does die, I'll be relieved, and I may even be happy.<br><br> The cherry on top of this rage-filled ice cream is Trump. I'm sure I don't need to explain why I'm angry with him.<br><br> These 3 people take up 80% of my thoughts every day. I'm so angry with them, and I don't know how to stop being so angry. I want them to suffer, and I want to be the one to make them suffer. I don't just want them to suffer a little bit, I want them to suffer a lot. I want their lives ruined. I want them to be in constant pain, and I want them to know that I'm the one who's causing it.<br><br> I've ignored advice from people before, and it's never worked out well. I'm not going to ignore advice now. How do I stop being so angry all the time?<br><br> I don't know how to stop being angry, but I do recognize that my anger isn't helping anyone. It's making it difficult for me to work, and it's making it difficult for me to interact with people I care about. It's taking a toll on my mental and physical health. It's causing me to be mean to people I care about, because I'm taking my anger out on them. It's just making my life harder, and it's not causing any harm to the people I'm angry at.<br><br> I need help figuring out how to stop being angry.