I found out everyone in my life thinks I’m a jerk and it has broken me up inside to the point I don’t know what to do.

I wasn’t sure where else to go with this so here I am. My birthday is next week so last weekend my girlfriend of three years, Beth, wanted to plan an early birthday dinner for me. Beth’s mom was invited and besides her my one other friend, Adam. So right off the bat I felt something was off because both my and Adam’s girlfriends weren’t invited. So I asked about why they weren’t invited and Beth just ignored it. <br><br>So we get to the restaurant and I noticed Adam is acting very standoffish. So I asked him if he was okay then he just stared at me until Beth and her mother were away. He then finally spoke and told me that I was a jerk, that I make everyone uncomfortable, and that he only still talks to me out of pity. He went on and explained how my jokes were unfunny, I’m constantly making mistakes like forgetting names or important details, that everything I do seems unintentionally offensive, and that even my attempts at being nice are received negatively. He said Beth told me that both girls were invited just to spare my feelings but that really they didn’t want to be there. The whole restaurant started to spin as I listened and I could see every moment I’ve shared with these people and how it was received.<br><br>Beth and her mother soon came back to the table and asked what we were talking about. Adam just told them he was saying happy birthday to me but I knew he was lying and covering for me. The rest of the dinner went by in a blur. After the dinner Beth and Adam’s girlfriend were invited to spend the night over my place. Beth and I were in the kitchen doing the dishes when out of nowhere she just blurted out “You know Adam was telling the truth right? That everyone thinks you’re a jerk.” She went on about how I make her uncomfortable with my off color jokes and gifts, how I get important dates and names wrong, and how I make everyone feel awkward just being around me. I tried to apologize but she said I shouldn’t worry about it since I can’t help being a jerk. The rest of the night I was just dazed and trying to pretend everything was fine but really everything Adam and Beth told me kept replaying in my mind and I couldn’t help but think that they were right. Once they all left and I was alone I just broke down and cried.<br><br>I’ve been fighting back tears ever since and I just don’t know what to do. I don’t want to be a jerk but it seems to be my nature. I feel like I have to reevaluate my whole life and I just don’t know where to start.