Update: My (22F) boyfriend (25M) wants to be a stay at home dad. But I don’t want to marry him.

My original post got locked unfortunately, so I’m here with an update. I thought it was important to tell everyone who was so supportive what happened in the end. Here’s the update and then my previous post below it:<br><br>So like a lot of you suggested I tried talking to him, explaining I was sorry but I just don’t think I’m ready to commit. He looked so hurt and he asked me why I wouldn’t commit to him as he’s done nothing wrong. That’s when it clicked. The reason I was so against committing to him is that ever since his sister passed away, he became different. He’s become so overbearing and clingy and protective. After her passing, he would repeatedly ask me if I’m okay, tell me to be careful, double/triple check my seatbelt every time we’re in the car. He started touching my stomach and talking about our babies. Before I knew it, I couldn’t do anything without him needing to be involved. He’d ask me to go to the grocery store and I’d come home and he’s have a full on panic attack because he couldn’t find me for 10 minutes. I couldn’t go anywhere without him having to come, and I felt like I was losing myself and I couldn’t breathe. <br><br>When he asked why I wouldn’t commit, my brain just word vomited and I told him the truth. I explained how he’s changed and I feel like I’m losing my sense of self. I told him I don’t think staying at home with our kids when we’re 30 would be good for us. He was shocked. He looked like I’d just punched him. He told me I’m being dramatic, imaginary problems don’t help and I’m being selfish by taking away his dream of being a father. He also said I’m making up these problems. We had a huge fight and he told me to move out. It’s been 2 weeks since then and I miss him so much. I started thinking that yeah, maybe I was overreacting and being dramatic. Maybe I was just making up these problems. That was until I got a text from him saying “how are you? Please tell me you’re okay”. I felt so sick. <br><br>That overbearingness I was talking about? It never went away. In fact, it got worse. When we were fighting he couldn’t stop accusing me of making things up. He would not listen to me at all. It felt like he was invalidating my experience and my feelings. <br><br>I think he has severe issues blaming the world for taking his sister. I think he has a lot of trauma he needs to get therapy for. Me staying in the relationship will only enable him more. <br><br>I do hope he gets the help he needs, I really do. I just hope he realizes that isn’t me.<br><br>——-<br><br>My boyfriend and I were discussing our lives in our late 20s and he said he wants to be a stay at home dad. I told him that’s not something I want. He looked shocked and almost betrayed when I said I didn’t want to marry him. I don’t know what to do.<br><br>My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years and everything is going great. I’m 22 and he’s 25. We both go to university but I’ve gotten accepted to medical school and he’s doing some courses in game development. We were talking about our 5 year plan when he out of nowhere said he wants to be a stay at home dad when he’s in his 30s. <br><br>I felt shocked because I was not expecting it. I thought about it for a moment and told him I’m sorry, I don’t think I want to be a mother at all. <br><br>He looked hurt and almost betrayed. He asked me why I wouldn’t want to marry him and have kids together. I was shocked. I told him that’s not what I said, I said I don’t want to be a mother and I’m not sure about marrying him yet. <br><br>That hurt him even more and he told me to get out and not come back until I know what I’m doing with my life. <br><br>I don’t know what to do. I really want to stay with him but I’m also not sure now if I want marriage and kids at all. He made it seem like we had an agreement that we’d get married and I had no clue. Where do I even go from here?<br><br>Tl;dr my boyfriend wants to be a stay at home dad but I don’t want to marry or have kids. What do?