I (28M) snooped on my wife (28F) and it was the most gut-wrenching thing I’ve ever done

My wife and I have a 4 year old daughter and about 5 months ago, our little girl was diagnosed with severe non-verbal autism. <br><br>Our daughter not only has extreme behavioral issues like headbutting (to the point where she gave herself a black eye) and biting and hitting us, but she’s also a runner which is potentially fatal. Our house is childproofed but with her temper and tantrums it’s nearly impossible to take her out. She’ll throw a fit in the car and undo her carseat or throw a fit in a store and bolt away from us. It’s as if she has zero awareness of the dangers around her and she cannot communicate. <br><br>We were told early on that she might need to be institutionalized. It sounded crazy but now I’m not so sure. <br><br>All of this was hard for both of us to take in, but it hit my wife especially hard. She went from crying and feeling sorry for herself, to dragging herself through every day, to inexplicably taking matter into her own hands. <br><br>My wife is a stay at home mom. She was a massage therapist for a few years after graduating college before she decided to take some time off to raise our daughter. <br><br>The very day we got our little girl’s diagnosis, my wife went on our joint laptop and deleted her massage therapy account and email for good. She told me she felt guilty working and making money when our daughter needs so much attention. So she quit cold turkey and threw herself into therapies and trying to help our little girl. <br><br>It was kind of concerning but I was deep in grief myself and the pressure was off me to pay for her to go to massage therapy school. <br><br>Weeks went by and I noticed my wife was taking our daughter to appointments that I’d never heard of. “Autism Helpers of America.” “Baby Reboarnment Therapy Center.” “Sensory Integration Center.” And I trusted her on it all because at the time I didn’t want to think about our daughter’s condition or the fact that she might need to be institutionalized. <br><br>The last few weeks I noticed my wife was becoming extremely irritable. Okay. I grew irritable too. The constant screaming gets to you after awhile. <br><br>But things just didn’t seem right and my wife wasn’t myself anymore. I was starting to feel like I was losing her too. She was constantly on our joint laptop while our daughter slept. <br><br>I never in a million years ever snooped on anyone. But I finally gave in and decided to snoop on my wife. I looked through our joint laptop after she fell asleep. Everything was perfectly innocent. Amazon, Amazon, Amazon. Target. Walmart. <br><br>Finally I hit on something. An incognito tab. <br><br>I opened it and my whole world crashed down. It was a website called “Autism Cured” and there was a picture of TERA, TMS, and a bunch of other random technology (I won’t specify which ones because it could be considered a trigger for some people). The place was run by some “Dr. Phil” who claimed to have helped cured his own autistic son with his bare hands and was in control of shadow demons. <br><br>There were so many case studies. So many testimonials. <br><br>It was terrifying. <br><br>I knew right then and there I had to get out of there. I shut the laptop and left the room.<br><br>When I returned I acted like everything was fine. But inside I was freaking out. I couldn’t believe she was going along with this. I couldn’t believe she signed up for a therapy center run by a demon-hating quack. <br><br>The whole car ride was unbearable. My wife chattered excitedly about what was going to happen at our daughter’s “autism-healing appointment” today. I can’t remember what exactly she said. <br><br>All I know is that the therapy center was in some guy’s house. Some guy who claimed to have “healed” his own autistic son. <br><br>I didn’t say anything the whole time. I just kept checking my phone and making sure the audio was turned off while the GPS gave me directions. I don’t know if she suspected anything. <br><br>We arrived and I asked my wife if she could get our daughter while I got a call. <br><br>I stepped inside the car. <br><br>I pulled up the website from the incognito page in my browser on my phone. At the bottom was the contact box and phone number. <br><br>I dialed the number. <br><br>“Autism Cured, how can I help you,” the guy on the other end said. “Did you send in your child’s Shadow Demon Questionnaire?” <br><br>I hung up. <br><br>My wife tapped on the window. <br><br>I rolled it down. “Yeah?” <br><br>“Is everything okay?” <br><br>“Yeah. Can you tell Dr. Phil I’m not going to let him torture our daughter anymore. We don’t need these bullshit autism treatments.” <br><br>My wife was taken aback. She asked me how I knew and then she knew I’d snooped. She started to panic and told me to stop. She tried to put her hand on my arm but I shook it off. <br><br>I asked her if she was insane. If she was really this delusional that she was going to throw our last hope to help our daughter out the window because some demon-hating freak claimed he cured his own autistic son 15 years ago. <br><br>“I’d rather her grow out of it than be tortured and potentially killed by some sick freak,” I said. <br><br>She tried to calm me down but I wasn’t having it. I told her we were leaving and I was going to report this sick motherfucker. <br><br>She begged me not to. <br><br>She said I needed to calm down for our daughter. <br><br>I asked her if she knew what kind of danger she’d just put our daughter in. <br><br>She said it was for the best. <br><br>I asked her how torturing her with TERA, TMS, exorcisms, and the like was for the best. <br><br>She said our daughter needed it. She was “sick.” And Dr. Phil said he could cure her. <br><br>I just lost it at that. I laughed like a maniac and told her she was delusional. I asked her what made her think this. Did she really believe some guy claiming he cured his son with his own bare hands? <br><br>She said she did and then she told me to fuck off. <br><br>She took our daughter and left. <br><br>When she got home she locked herself in our bedroom and I never saw her again. <br><br>It’s been two days since then and I don’t know where to go from here. I feel like I’ve lost my wife and the trust we once had is irreparable. I just feel so empty and alone and angry and hurt. I don’t know where to turn. <br><br>How do I approach her?