How to make friends in college

I think it’s really cool how every year we have this discussion. Many people in this sub have gone to college, we all have gone through the same experience of making friends in a new place.<br><br>So here’s some advice from a senior in college that will graduate with 5 best friends. <br><br>**If you are going to ask a person to hang out with you, make sure you are serious about hanging out with them. I have made the mistake of being friendly, and then when they ask if I want to hang out, I just ghost them. Bad idea. Be cautious with meeting people, but also be serious when you say yes.**<br><br>Sort of a given, but work on improving you social skills. If you don’t know how, just pay attention to what people do, and imitate them. I lived in an apartment building for a semester, and the other day, I met my neighbor who was a freshman. He wanted to get food together, but I had nothing much better to say than”Oh, nice.” I asked him about his major, and he said he was in “finance” (a field I know nothing about). Then he said he was looking for a really expensive degree with an average income, and I said, “Maybe you should just join the military like I did.” Bad joke, I know. My point is that you can always improve. When I was an engineer, I was bad at social skills. But I am actually pretty good at them now.<br><br>**If you are a shy person, you are going to be the best friend of a few people. But if you are outgoing, you will have lots of friends, but no actual best friends.**<br><br>A poor shy friend of mine got four best friends. But there are a few of us who are outgoing. I never hang out with them, they never hang out with me, and they never hang out with me and each other. <br><br>So pick which one you want. If you want to have lots of friends, make sure you are outgoing but don’t raise your expectations. Also, be expecting to be ghosted by your outgoing friends. Not because they are bad people. It’s just that the more people they know, the less time they have for each one.<br><br>On the other hand, if you are shy, just be yourself. That’s so corny but it’s true. If you are shy then just be a good listener, and don’t worry about being the best conversationalist. I had the good fortune of having 4 shy friends, and all of them ended up being their best friends.<br><br>**Your maior has no impact on your life, unless you are going to be a STEM major, and even then it depends on the STEM major.**<br><br>I have a lot of friends, and I have a friend who is a biology major, a friend who is an English major, a friend who is a psychology major, a friend who is a meteorology major, and a friend who is a theater major. And none of them know anything about their subjects. My psychology major friend can’t name 3 different psychological theories. My biology major friend can’t name the 11 systems of the body. My English major friend can’t quote any famous poetry. My theater major friend can’t name any famous plays. My meteorology major friend can’t tell you tomorrow’s weather.<br><br>If you want to major in a STEM field, make sure you know something about STEM. I was going to be an engineer, but I switched to a humanities major. Even though I never formally took engineering classes, I was really good at them. But for some reason I’m bad at the classes for my major. So I switched. I didn’t really put any thought into it. I just let my GPA decide for me.<br><br>**Live in a dorm--><br><br>Yup. Live in a dorm. I lived in an apartment and a dorm, and the dorm was way better. But dorm living has its downsides. My roommate was a complete loser. He was from a small town in the country, and didn’t know anything about the city. He never wanted to go out, he was too scared to eat at a restaurant by himself, he mispronounced some big words he never knew. I’d do his laundry and make him do my dishes. (I didn’t actually make him do that, but I did have to clean up after him a lot). I almost got evicted because he left dirty dishes on the floor for two months. But he was actually a really nice guy, so I was cool with him. I just wished my roommate was cooler. <br><br>However, my freshman year has been the best year of my life. The first night I got there, I met every person in my dorm. The night after that, I got invited to a party, and met even more people there. I met 4 people the first night, and 7 the second. Those 11 people became 7 close friends and 4 acquaintances. In fact, my best friend was my ex-roommate. He was 1 of the 11 people I met. So there you have it. If you live in a dorm, you will meet people. And if you live in an apartment, you won’t. Also, if you live in a dorm, you will have an RA to tell you when to party and when not to party. My apartment’s RA never showed up, but my dorm’s RA would always invite me to the dorm’s events. I almost got in trouble one time when he said there was a drinking party in the basement, I went there, and surprise, there was no drinking party. There were 9 cops. He was just trying to scare us away. I don’t know if he knew, but they didn’t arrest me.