I have to burst into tears so I need to talk to someone

My daughters are 2 & 4, and I love them very much and so proud of the little people they are turning out to be. We are doing okay, but not great financially. My toddler (4 year old) has never slept through the night and wakes us multiple times a night, she is very demanding and so she needs to be taken care of. She had a cold so that’s the reason she has been waking up so much. Sometimes she is just afraid and needs to have me hold her for a while until she falls asleep so she has been sleeping with us for the past few days.<br><br>We just started a new job, we don’t have a baby sitter besides family (who are out of town right now). Right now I’m home 24/7 with them plus my daughter’s cold is contagious so I don’t want to send her to daycare and get all those babies sick. The job is remote, so I can work from home, so I decide to bring my laptop and稿it down and work while my kids play so I can keep an eye on them. Last night I was working, and my daughter fell asleep so I was working with my 2 year old just sitting next to me. I was having a breakdown because I don’t have the opportunity to do my job to the best of my ability because I have to watch my 2 kids and most of my time is spent away from my job trying to soothe my kids. I ask my 2 year old, “why do I have to be your mommy? I want to have a job!” I am hurt by this now. I have always wanted to be a mom, and I love my kids but sometimes I feel like I never get a break and I feel trapped. <br><br>These are my feelings, so how do I get past this? Right now I’m balling my eyes out.<br><br>Edit: I was advised to remove personal info from this post.