Wife admitted to having bad sex because she felt unattractive

Not sure if this is the right place but I was just interested in hearing your thoughts. I’ve been married to my wife for about three years now and everything has been going well. We were having lots of fun together, lots of sex, no fight, no problems. But recently I started to notice that she started to stop singing or dancing. She would stop trying to make conversation. She would just stare at her phone. I asked her if there was something up but she just said she was tired. I asked if she was okay but she said she was fine.<br><br>It went on like this for a few months and I didn’t know why, I thought maybe she was upset with me and if so it would be better to just let her tell me when she wants to.<br><br>But then a while back she had a bit of a breakdown when she tried to make dinner and burnt it and started crying and ran out the house and I tried to follow her but she just wanted to be left alone. I was very confused. I waited for her to come home and then I had to get her to stop crying so I could talk to her. I asked again if she was okay and she said she wasn’t. I asked if she wanted to tell me what’s wrong and she said I didn’t have to be so nice to her.<br><br>Then she started crying more and I tried holding her but she said to leave her alone and then she left again. I didn’t know what to do so I called my mom and told her everything. She said don’t I know that she’s pregnant? I said no and she said that’s why she’s so upset. She said that she was only just talking to her and that this was months ago. I was shocked and I didn’t know why she wouldn’t tell me. My mom said she was probably upset or scared and didn’t know how to deal with it.<br><br>She suggested that I talk to her and I agreed so I waited again for her to come home. I told her that I knew she was pregnant and I was excited and I wanted us to stay together. She started crying again and said she wasn’t. She said she didn’t want to have any kids and she was using a condom and she didn’t know what to do. I asked why she didn’t tell me and she said she didn’t know what to do because she wasn’t ready.<br><br>I told her that’s okay if she wasn’t but that I really wanted to be a father and I promised I would be a good father and she would be a good mom and we would figure this out together.<br><br>Then after that she was a lot happier. She was smiling and cooking and dancing and seemed much more relaxed. We started making plans for the baby and we started buying lots of things.<br><br>Last night I was holding her and she looked at me and said it would be wonderful if we did have the baby. I said it would be if she was ready but she said she was. She said she was scared because I was so nice to her and she didn’t deserve me. I said she didn’t mean that and tried to kiss her but she said it was true. She said she felt awful because she didn’t do anything for me and I bought her lots of things. She said she was being a terrible wife and she felt unattractive and worthless. I said no it’s not that and we both know that I wanted to have a baby. She said but she didn’t and I didn’t listen. I said I was sorry if I made her unhappy but she said no she was happy. That she was so happy being with me and marrying me and that she wants to have the baby and be a mom. She just didn’t want to have kids right now and she wasn’t ready.<br><br>I said that’s okay and I understood. And she said she didn’t deserve that I was so nice. I said she did and we both know that and she should stop being so hard on herself because it’s her choice. She said she felt like she was cheating me because I wanted to be a dad but she wouldn't let me. I said she’s not a cheat and she’s being too hard on herself. I said she was an amazing wife and an incredible woman and if I wanted to be with anyone else I would be.<br><br>Then she said it was the reason she didn’t want to have sex with me anymore. I asked why and she said she felt too bad and didn’t want to be intimate. I said I didn’t want that but she said she felt guilty. I said that’s okay if she didn’t want to but I was going to be very honest and I need sex or I get really upset. She said not to worry about it, she didn’t mind and she would do it because she knew I needed it.<br><br>Then she said I needed to be honest and tell her how I felt. I said of course I wouldn’t mind having sex but I didn’t want her to do it because she felt bad or guilty. She said then I needed to tell her if she felt bad or guilty and I needed to be honest.<br><br>I said I would be and I promised. I said I knew she felt upset and I needed to be honest in case she was avoiding intimacy because of it. I said I love her and she’s an amazing wife but I know she’s not doing it because she likes it. I said we both know that and so I would be honest with her from now on and she needed to be honest with me in case she didn’t want to have sex anymore. She said of course and she loved me. I told her I loved her too.<br><br>It’s been about two months now and we’ve been more intimate than ever. I’m not sure what happened to make her feel so bad but it’s been better.