[UPDATE] I (25F) told my boyfriend (28M) about my kinks and he said I was disgusting

tl;dr: Thank you everyone for the support and advice. I'm leaving him and I told him I'm leaving. I moved out and he is begging for us to work it out. I started going out with one of the guys I was crushing on and I am so much happier.<br><br>**Original post:**<br><br>I (25F) am in a relationship with my boyfriend (28M) for just over 3 years. He's sweet, nice and caring, and I love him. However, I have a dark past. I was raped and sexually abused for a few years. After the abuse ended, I developed some kinks.<br><br>These include choking, rough sex, being degraded, spit on, the pov stuff, you get the idea. I know that these would give a normal man red flags, but I need these things in order to cum. And after my abuse ended, I had a hard time even getting aroused. But with these kinks, I can finally have some normal sex.<br><br>So, I told my boyfriend about all this. And well, he didn't take it well. He said I was disgusting and that he needed time to get over this. We live together, so he's been sleeping on the couch.<br><br>Of course I understand that this was rough on him, but I felt like he went too far. I told him that he shouldn't view me like I'm disgusting, cause that would break up our relationship. He said he needed a few days to get over it. This was about two weeks ago.<br><br>I don't think he's been cheating, but he spends all his time away from home. I've tried to talk to him, but he's avoided me. He's called me a disgusting bimbo, a slut and he left the house when I tried to hug him. He's also started smoking again and drinking heavily.<br><br>Our relationship is pretty much over, but I don't know what to do. I was planning on breaking up, but I don't know when. I know he's coming back tomorrow night, as we are having guests over. So I have until tomorrow to figure out how I should act, when I should break up and what my next move is in general.<br><br>Is there a way I can salvage the relationship? Or should I just leave him?<br><br>Also, if you have experiance with similar kinks and they ruined your relationships, please tell me about them.<br><br>Edit:&#x200B;<br>Wow, I didn't expect this many responses this fast. <br><br>So, I got conned by a nice guy and I'm shook. One of the comments posted was by my boyfriends new account, and he said that he was very understanding and compassionate and that I was the disgusting one. I guess I got what I deserved for being so blind.<br><br>Also, to everyone asking how to move. <br><br>1: I have a bunch of bags already, but I'm probably going to use my car to get most of my stuff to my parents or my friend. <br><br>2: I didn't write this in my original post for some reason, but I work remote, so I can work anywhere. <br><br>3: He doesn't make much more than me. I make about 10,000$ a month, just for context. I'd say he makes about half that. <br><br>4: I have a savings, but it's basically empty because we used it to pay our living expenses and I also bought my car from that. But it's also basically empty now. <br><br>5: I don't know how getting an abortion has anything to do with my situation?<br><br>6: I also appreciate those of you who sent me death threats. Very classy.<br><br>7: Some people assumed that I'm a man and that my boyfriend is a woman, I guess that's a compliment?<br><br>8: To those who said that I'm acting like a victim, I'm not. I takes a lot of courage to open up like this. I know it was my decision to open up, but it still takes a lot of guts to do. Also, I'm not asking for anything but advice. <br><br>9: To those saying that I should've kept this secret to myself, I know. It's too late now.<br><br>Edit2: I just looked through his phone and saw texts of him having sex with his ex and how he was understanding of her fetishes and how he said that he used me to feel better. He also told his ex that I'm a freak and that I'm disgusting. I feel like I need to vomit. I'm leaving him now.<br><br>Edit3: I left him and moved to my parents for now. I am feeling a bit better. I called my old friend and he was really supportive and said that he's going to help me get through this. He's also really attractive, so I'm going to spend some time with him. Thank you all for the support and advice.