I just want to feel safe

I was talking about my birthday plans with a male coworker (I mention this because girlfriends would never get me like this) and I told him I was going to eat Mexican food, drink some margaritas and maybe watch a movie or something. He asked me if I was going to be at home or out to eat. When I told him I was staying home he asked me if I would drink "too much" ? Then he said something about "do you need a night off?". I laughed and said yeah I do, getting old sucks. <br><br>I think what he's saying is that I'm just out here drinking alone because I don't get laid at my age. I mean that's what he said. I've been married three times. I've been divorced three times. I've been engaged once. I have two children and five grandchildren. I just want to be left alone to live my life without a man. <br><br>But I feel unsafe. I feel like I need to be careful. I feel like I'm putting myself at risk if I just do my thing. I feel exposed. I feel like I need to be ready. I feel like I can't trust anyone. I feel like I'm betraying myself. <br><br>Am I too sensitive?