What does it feel like to kill someone?

Does it feel like ecstasy and fear all at once?<br><br>Does it feel like it doesn't feel? Like nothing can kill it?<br><br>Or does it feel like a load off your shoulders? Like you killed the weight of a bad habit?<br><br>Or does it feel like guilt? Like a stone that can't be lifted?<br><br>I think it feels like guilt.<br><br>I have to imagine what it'd be like to kill someone when I write about it. I can't just wander around killing random people just for the sake of realistic writing. Nor would I want to. But I have to imagine what it'd be like. What **you** would do.<br><br>You think back to how it happened, where it happened and the colour of the blood on your hands. How badly it hurt to hurt someone else. How it hurts even more when you think about what you did. That guilt is always there, whether it's on your shoulders, on your back or in your gut. The worst part about it is that you can't put it behind you. You can't "get rid of it" like a bad habit. It's a part of you and there's no way of getting rid of it. You always know that you're a killer. You always know what you did. With every breath, you are reminded of the fact that you are a killer.<br><br>Maybe I'm projecting what it would feel like onto you, but it can't feel any different than that. I know it can't.<br><br>So I know that if you ever were to kill someone, it would hurt more than it would help.