I fell in love with my dad.

It's been eating at my mind for over a year now. I've tried to fight it and now I've been thinking to end my life if I don't do something about it.<br><br>I'm a 20 year old, in college. My mom passed away when I was 3 years old. I've been raised by my dad and my grandma. I don't even remember my mom. I have a terrible crush on my dad. It makes me sick to think about it. I just can't seem to stop loving him. I've been feeling this way for a strong 1 and a half years. I've went out on a few dates but those guys don't interest me and I just end up going home and think about him. I don't know whether I should feel guilty or not. I know it's wrong and I know its not socially acceptable, but I can't help but feel that I should be allowed to love whoever I want to. He's the one that took care of me, from feeding me to taking me to school, to buying me clothes, to making my hair when I was little, being there for me through thick and thin. He's the only one that actually loves me. I can't help but feel this way whenever he hugs me or kisses me or touches me or pats my head. All of those just makes me melt. I love him so much. He's the best dad ever and I'm so proud to have him as my father. I can't help but think "what if". I'm planning on going to therapist or some kind of counselor to talk about my problem. I know I have a problem. I don't even know if I should or could tell him (my dad). I don't want to ruin our relationship. I don't want to ruin my life. I don't want to ruin his. I don't even know how to act. I'm scared.