Your mouth is a time portal. It’s seriously fucked up the entire timeline.

First off, bravo on making tangerines before the invention of the wheel. <br><br>While you’re feeling good about achieving that, can I interest you in a nice juicy orange instead? <br><br><br>[UPDATE 6/03/21: Holy hell this got popular, thanks Reddit. If you’re looking for similar prompts they’re all under my profile in the WritingPrompts category. ]<br><br>[UPDATE 6/03/21 Part 2: Since you fine people apparently love corrupting the timeline via food, I’ve compiled all the top voted suggestions along with some from the comments into a timeline. I'll be updating them as more keep coming in cause why not. I’d also like to give a shout out to u/king_nef for giving this its own page on alternatehistory.com. ]