For every time I hit delete, I spend about 10 minutes thinking about the words I just deleted. Why the hell do I do that?

It almost happens every time I write a story now. I write, bop along, then hit a little snag, like a pothole in the road that turns me off the road and into the ditch. So I delete my story and start over and I'm even more lost, more confused, more overwhelmed then I was before.<br><br>I delete because the words don't seem right, like my characters are talking in voices that aren't their own. I delete because I can't speak with the right voice. I delete because perfectionism has me strangled. I delete because I'm an idiot and I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I delete because I'm afraid.<br><br>I delete and then I look back and imagine what the story could have been like if I had followed the first path. I imagine where it would have gone and how I would have welded the story together, how I would have fixed the snag. I imagine and then I realize I lost the path, the trail that went over the mountain. I'm so obsessed with this path, that I remain stuck on it, couldn't think about anything else, because I can't let go of the road I didn't take, which is so much better than the road I did take, even though it's lost, even though I'll never find it.<br><br>&#x200B;<br><br>Edit: If you're a troll, then why the fuck are you here? In this sub? That just goes to show how much of an asshole you are, a person who posts in a sub like this, who intentionally goes out of their way to hurt someone else, an artist, a creative. You know nothing of the dedication it takes to be one, of the hard work, the long hours. You know nothing of what comes out of our hands, what is born into the world. With your hate, you are killing art, killing the people who make the world brighter, make it more interesting, more fun. With your hate, I imagine you are a sad lonely pathetic person, who has nothing better to do then hurt others. I probably feel more sorry for you then anything, because it must suck to be you, to be a hater. <br><br>&#x200B;<br><br>Edit 2: I'm blown away by all the support. I had no idea this would touch so many of you. Thank you. I love all of you. You are not alone.