Being a man is trash

I feel like shit. I wake up every morning and I feel trashy and gross. I got up and looked in the mirror and I got a hard on. I saw a pic of myself from before and I was hot but I dont feel like that now. I can smell myself and, I dont know it just feels like shit. Everything feels like shit. I dont know why things have to be bad for me. I hate everything and everyone and I dont want anything to do with anyone. I look at my face and I hate myself. I want to punch myself in the face. I hate myself so much. I hate this world and I hate who I am. I dont want to be here and I never ever want to be here again. I feel like everything is my fault and I just dont like anything anymore. I dont like any of this. I dont like anything. I hate everything.