I want to convert back to Hinduism but how? I feel confused and a little hopeless

I was born a Hindu. All my relatives are Hindus. I used to go to temple with my family when I was a child. I was a Hindu. But my parents, like many Indians, didn't practice any Hindu rituals, or follow Hinduism. It was a religion for them but not a way of life. My mother was an atheist. My sister got a Christian boyfriend and converted to Christianity. My parents were angry but they were okay with it. I was 13 at that time. And I didn't know anything about Hinduism. I just followed it blindly. <br><br>I was always very socially awkward, and didn't have any friends. But one day, I was talking to a classmate of mine and she was talking about sins and hell, and saying that basically every person in the world is a sinner and we will all go to hell. And I asked them if Hinduism is also a religion that talks about heaven and hell, and sinners. And she said no, Hinduism in general doesn't talk about sinners and hell. <br><br>And then I asked her, then should we become Christians? And she said yes. I thought about it and then I decided to convert to Christianity. And then everything I had to do was to believe in Jesus Christ and I was a Christian. I didn't care about my family. I didn't care about anything. I just wanted to feel something. And I felt something. I was happy. I was good. I felt like I was on the right path. I was a good Christian. I went to church every Sunday. I read the Bible often, and believed in it. Prayed every day. I felt very confident and sure. And then I started to read the Bible on my own, and that's where I second guessed Christianity. I read of the Old Testament. I read about hell and the punishments described in the Bible. I read about how God is a jealous God. And I realized that this is not the kind of God I like. <br><br>And the Bible says that anyone who doesn't believe in Christianity will go to hell. I knew that if I go back to Hinduism, and if Christianity is true, I will go to hell. And I was terrified. I didn't know what to think. I was so confused. So I started researching. I read every religion. Islam, Buddhism, Jainism, Sikhism. I studied Taoism, Confucianism, Shinto, Judaism. I read the Quran, the Gita, the Guru Granth Sahib, the Aagamas, the Bible, the Torah. I realized that there is no proof for any one of these religions. I liked Hinduism. But I knew that it was not true. But I knew that I wanted to follow Hinduism. Hinduism is a great religion. It is good and real. It talks about heaven and hell, karma, reincarnation. But even if it's not true, it teaches you to live a good life. And I wanted to live a good life. But I was scared. I knew that I had sinned. I knew that I had done wrong things. I knew that if I do this and that, I will not get liberation. So I did this and that. I followed all the rules but I knew that I won't get enlightened. I was sad. I was second guessing. I was scared of hell. And then I started researching hell. And I realized that no one knows anything about hell. I realized that hell is just a concept in every religion. I realized that even if I believe in hell, it won't make any difference. I will be scared, but I won't do any good to myself by believing in hell. I will just be scared and sad, and then I will forget. I will forget and then I will sin again. And then I will feel bad again. It's a cycle. And then I decided to follow Hinduism. I decided to follow Hinduism without believing in anything. And I am very happy. Hinduism is a beautiful religion and I love it. But I still have some doubts. <br><br>* There is no loyalty in this world. Nothing is permanent and no one is loyal to anyone or anything. Then why should I be loyal to Hinduism? Why should I follow it?<br>* I want to follow Hinduism but I don't believe in the concept of karma, hell and heaven. I don't believe in God. I don't believe in the Vedas. So can I still call myself a Hindu?<br>* Is Hinduism a good religion? Will it make me a better person? Is it good for the people around me?<br>* What's the point of following Hinduism? What's the point of following any religion? <br>* I don't want to do wrong things and I want to do the right things, but what are right and wrong things? How can I decide what to do or what not to do? <br>* I know that Hinduism is not true but how can I follow it?<br>* Should I follow Hinduism even if I don't believe in it?