My wife has been having "online" sex w/ some dude for years, I just found out.

I'm in shock right now, our Anniversary is coming up and I wanted to do something special for her, so I wanted to make her "couple bucket list". I went onto her laptop to make the list, and noticed she had a bunch of tabs open, I assumed it was for whatever dumb female chambers, but I noticed one in particular called "Kik". Never heard of it, so I opened it and it was some messaging app, she was chatting w/ some guy, and I can see their entire conversation. It's been going on for almost 4 yrs. I don't recognize the guy, but I saw that he sent a picture of his face to her, I took a screenshot of it to show to my friends at work tomorrow to see if they recognize the dude.<br><br>They have some weird ass conversations, but from what I can tell, it's just sexting, sending pics, etc. I've never suspected her of cheating, never thought she would, but here I am. <br><br>4 yrs, I feel like I need to confront her, can't live my life not knowing, and it'll eat at me forever. I did look at the conversation and it's still going on to this day, and they made plans for her to send him a, "video" later tonight. I'm just in shock, and I don't even know what to do, I'm just angry right now. I'm upset that I'm angry b/c it's not "real" cheating, but it feels like it, you know?<br><br>I don't even know how to confront her, I just don't want to, I keep thinking of all the things that could go wrong if I do. I feel like I need to, but the more I think about it, the more I don't want to ruin our marriage.<br><br>Idk what to do.<br><br>EDIT: I think it would be best if I just left it alone for now, I'll sleep on it and maybe think about it tomorrow.