My (34F) husband (31M) wants to see what I’d look like with a breast reduction when he’s already told me he likes the way I look and that he’d never change a thing about me.

**I am very pretty. So is my husband. We have been pretty all our lives and people have always made that very clear. It’s hard to get past that kinda thing, believe it or not. While I do not like that I’m pretty and I don’t like the connection pretty has with self worth, I do appreciate having a pretty husband. So he’s included here because I believe it is relevant that we are both pretty and that people have commented on our looks and “how our babies will be pretty” and that kind of stuff.**<br><br><br>My husband was the only guy who ever made me feel wanted and valued for more than my looks. I can’t stress enough how much this means to me. He’s the only man who’s ever said I’m beautiful when I have no makeup on. He’s the only man who has told me I’m beautiful at my thinnest and fattest. He’s the only man to ever make me feel, in every moment, like I’m beautiful inside and out. He’s told me on numerous occasions that he wouldn’t change a thing about me, and has brought me to tears because of it. He’s been my partner for almost 11 years and when I was younger, he was the first guy to make me feel so incredibly beautiful and valuable that I loved myself after years of being told I wasn’t good enough because I wasn’t pretty enough. <br><br><br>I have very large breasts and although I hate them, my husband loves them. I have always felt self conscious about my body and it’s just worse with large breasts. I cannot get bras that fit and finding shirts that fit is difficult. I have constant pains in my shoulders and upper back and I just do not like them. For a very long time, I have wanted a breast reduction. <br><br><br>My husband will sometimes change his mind about things he was once fervent about, so I didn’t bring it up until I was sure. One day, I told him I wanted a breast reduction. He flipped out. Told me I was crazy, that he loved the way I looked and that I should change my mind. That breasts are a woman’s best asset (yeah, this one pissed me off) and I’d be ruining that asset by getting them reduced. He was so angry I didn’t bring it up again. Until the other day. I told him I was going to see a doctor about getting a breast reduction and he just looked at me and said, “Can we just see what it would look like if you had smaller breasts before you go through with it?” I was so confused and asked what he meant. He said he’d edit some pictures of me so I have smaller breasts. I said okay, but I don’t know if that will change my mind. He was happy about it. I sent him a bunch of pictures of me and he said he’d edit them. I have not yet seen the pictures and I’m not really sure what to do. I don’t want him to feel unhappy but I also don’t want to live with these breasts forever. <br><br><br>I have an appointment with a doctor next week and am going to go through with it. I just need to know how to handle this now. I want him to understand that this is what I want, but I also don’t want him to feel bad. <br>What do I do?<br><br>TL;DR! - I want a breast reduction. My husband loves my large breasts but when I said I wanted them smaller he flipped out and said he’d edit pictures of me so I have smaller breasts. How do I make him see that this is what I want?<br><br>UPDATE! - Thank you all for your comments! I showed my husband the post and told him it was for my own records. He was so offended that this was here and told me that it was none of your business. While editing the pictures of me, he said he realized that, yes, breasts are a woman’s best asset and he stood behind that. He said he was doing this because he loves me and knows that I want smaller breasts. He said that I am beautiful no matter what and when I said this conversation was for my records, he said that was fine, but he wanted me to know he supports me and will stand behind pretty much any decision I make. Also, a lot of you said things like, “He says he likes you but this proves he doesn’t!” I just want to say that, yes, things he has said were upsetting, but he’s always been a very sweet and caring man. I don’t think he’s a jerk, but I do think he pretty much forgot I was there for a minute. He’s never been told he’s pretty and I believe he forgot what that was like because he was pretty hyped up on his own looks. I think that’s why he said breasts are a woman’s best asset - because he was raised in a society that said so and he was so excited about the pictures that he forgot about me. When I told him this post was for records, he apologized and told me he was so excited about editing the pictures because it made him feel like an artist. He then told me I am an inspiration to him and that he forgot I was a person, not just a pretty picture. I forgave him and we both went to bed feeling very happy. I showed him this post because reading all the comments on both my phone and computer made me feel very unhappy and unheard and so I decided to show him. He was pretty upset, but when he finished reading all the comments, he just said, “Wow. I’m really sorry if I offended you or made me feel unseen and unheard. That was not my intention and I will do better in the future.” <br><br><br>Also, for the people who said they’d leave a partner for this, I just want to say this was only one incident in our long relationship where he made me feel this way. I can’t leave a person over one thing. I know a few of you were in relationships where this kind of thing happened on a regular basis and I’m sorry you went through that. I can’t leave him for one thing when he’s been so good to me otherwise. <br><br><br>Also, to clear up some things, I do not hate myself. I hate my breasts. My husband does not hate me. He just forgot I was there and was so excited about being an artist. When he was done editing the pictures, he told me how beautiful I am and how lucky he is to have me in his life and that he doesn’t know what he’d do without me. He said that I’m his partner and his best friend and that he couldn’t imagine his life without me. He said he supports me no matter what, pretty much, and that he knows I am the one who gets to choose what happens to my body. He said he may not like it, but he will accept it. Then he told me that when he was editing the pictures he realized breasts are a woman’s best asset and he stood behind that. He said he knows that what he said may upset me and he’s sorry for that. He then told me that he was pretty excited about editing the pictures because it made him feel like an artist and that he forgot that I am a person and not just a pretty picture that he can edit. I know I may sound like I’m making this up, but he did say all this. He’s always been so full of kind words and I don’t want to see him berated just because he forgot I’m a person. I know it’s wrong what he did, but I still love him.<br><br><br>Overall, I am happy with my husband. I am just not happy with my breasts and I know that I will feel better once they are smaller. I am going to do what I want to do and I know that, no matter what, my husband will always stand behind me and support me. He has proven that countless times. I’m so grateful for him and so grateful to live in a society where women can make decisions about their own bodies. I know I may have upset some of you and for that, I am sorry.