I’d like to ask all parties to please welcome the band ………. ???

This post is about the catastrophically terrible day at school I had today. First I’ll give you some context. I’m an English teacher in South Korea. I’ve been teaching here for the last year and a half at the same school. I really love it. This is my story of woe: Today I was given the job of hosting the school concert. This is my third time hosting it, and my last one of the school year before the school year ends. I’ve hosted many school concerts before, at many different schools, so I am pretty confident I can do this job. But today, I completely and utterly failed at it. This is very out of character. So here is what happened: The kids were all performing songs and dances and stuff all day. My job was to introduce them and welcome them to the stage. The kids had written down what they wanted me to say when introducing them. For example “Welcome with great pleasure class 3-1’s very own girls dance team” or “Please give a warm welcome to the class 3-2 Hip Hop Club”. I read the notes from the kids, exactly as they had written them. I’m an English teacher, so I was given the task of doing it in English. The kids had written the notes in Korean, but one of the other teachers had kindly translated them for me. So I read the first couple of notes that the teacher had given me. I read it perfectly. The children all cheered and it was a really happy atmosphere. It was so cute. Then I picked up the stack of notes to read the next one, but I accidentally dropped the stack of notes. I picked them up, but they were all jumbled out of order. I tried to put them in order, but some of them had slipped under the podium and the kids were waiting so I just read the next note out of order, and then tried to put the rest of them in order as I went along. I messed up. I read the wrong note. Instead of saying “Please welcome girls class 3-2” I said “Welcome with great pleasure class 3-1’s very own boys band”. It wasn’t the right note for the kids who were on the stage at the time. It was the wrong note. I read it out. I said “Welcome with great pleasure class 3-1’s very own boys band”. The kids who were on the stage at the time weren’t from class 3-1 and they weren’t a boys band. They weren’t even the boys group. A girl from the wrong class tried to argue with me that they weren’t a boys band, and I told her that I was just reading from the note so please don’t argue with me. The kids on the stage at the time were the girls dance team and they were supposed to be introduced as “The class 3-3 girls dance team”. But instead of that, I accidentally introduced them as a boys band. Then the real boys band (class 3-1) came on the stage. But I’d already introduced them because I’d accidentally read their note for the wrong class. I didn’t know what to say. So I made something up on the spot. I introduced them with “and now ……….????”. I shouted “AND NOW ?????????” at the top of my voice into the microphone. There was a really really really long pause. The kids looked at me and then they looked at each other. There was a really really really long awkward silence. Then the kids on the stage said “We are class 3-1’s boys band”. Then I shouted out at the top of my voice “WELCOME WITH GREAT PLEASURE CLASS 3-1’S BOYS BAND” just in case anyone still didn’t know who they were. I was really panicking. I was trying to just power through the rest of the concert. But it was a complete catastrophe. I accidentally introduced the class 3-5 girls ballet team as the class 3-4 girls modern dance team. Then I accidentally introduced the class 3-4 girls modern dance team as the class 3-5 girls ballet team. Then I accidentally read the same note that I’d already read for the class 3-4 girls. I made them do their dance twice so I could read the correct note for them . It was a complete and utter failure. I completely and utterly failed at this task. I don’t know what came over me. I was so stressed out. The kids were looking at me like I was insane. I’m just so devastated that I messed it up so badly. It was so bad.

I’d like to ask all parties to please welcome the band ………. ???

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