Tonight I'll be jerking off while my mostly unmarried friends are out with their SO's if they're lucky. It's 2023 and I'm still glad I'm an incel.

I'm one of those 'privledged' incels who scored above 140 on an official IQ test. When I was at my most vulnerable in my life, i was in a relationship with an older lady. She had an average face, average body, but the most beautiful bubbly personality I ever met. Why did I say yes? It's not like she directly did anything bad to me - she was kind and loving, the first to mostly give me oral (up until this point, it was a 50/50 split with my previous girlfriends). She liked me. Despite my average looks, she was the only one to compliment me and say I was handsome. I had no problem with her in the bedroom either. (I was 20, she was 30) 6 months into the relationship she met someone else and broke up with me. I still don't know why. I must've done something wrong, right? <br><br>After that, I stopped trying to find other partners. I was heartbroken then, but now I'm really starting to see the light. I'm not a nice guy, I don't go to church, I don't volunteer at a soup kitchen, I avoided joining the military. I don't have any redeeming traits. But even if I did, it wouldn't matter. I'm ugly, I'm not tall, I'm overweight, I'm a burden on society, I'm a full time student and part time worker. I'm not a catch, and I will never be. And you know what? I'm better off for it. Every night I spend time with my single friends who are in their 30's. Tonight we're going out to an expensive restaurant, then to a bar to get drink. Why am I out? I'm the designated driver. Nerd. I didn't put myself out there, I just wanted to have a good time. Tomorrow I'll be going back home to my house alone (it was my grandparents but they passed away and left me it) to do whatever I want. No one will stop me. I'll play my bass around 1am if I want. Why would I want to be in a relationship? I could hop on some dating apps, waste a bunch of money on dates, and probably end up alone again after a few years. No, I'd rather masturbate in peace to the 14 channels of Pornhub I have saved. I'm an ugly nerd, but my dick works and I have a colonial pipeline worth of cum to dump into an empty void any time I want. I'll never find happiness in a relationship. In fact, the only time I was in one, I was the most miserable I've ever been. I'm not socially awkward. I'm charismatic, I'm funny, I'm confident. But I'm ugly. And no, being fat doesn't help. I'm working on it. I lost 5 pounds this last week, and I haven't gained any back. I'm determined to reach 200lbs. I will make this body strong one day. I'll make it chiseled, I'll make it muscular. I'll be strong. And maybe one day I'll be with someone. But not now, and not anytime soon. I'm happy on my own.