I (38m) got called racist by my girlfriend (32f) due to a misunderstanding that this post will hopefully resolve

This is a follow up to my previous post with some pretty major changes. So after the first post I called her and told her I couldn’t sleep because I was so upset and I would really like to talk. She said she was pretty tired and upset and would like to take some time off to think about things. I told her I was going to fly out in the morning to have a serious relationship talk. She said she thought this was over. I said it wasn’t for me and I couldn’t imagine how she felt. She answered that this is over. We were done. I said if that’s the case I’d fly out that afternoon. She said she thought that was for the best. <br><br>I got off work at noon and flew out. On the plane I wrote her a letter (printed not handwritten) that had a list of bullet points that said: <br><br>- I love her<br>- I hope we can work this out<br>- I don’t want this to end but have no choice if she feels the way she does<br>- I wish she would give me a chance to tell my side <br>- I don’t want to talk to her friends and family yet <br>- I’m willing to go to counseling <br>- I’m willing to delete all my social media <br>- I was not happy at the idea of breaking up<br><br>She never answered any of my calls or text. I arrived at our apartment and it was empty. There was a note that said she was going to stay with her best friend and she had gotten a lawyer. I called my brother who thinks I may be in the right but needs to delete all my socials. He offered to let me stay with him and his wife. I said I’d think about it. <br><br>Then I called my mom. She told me I needed to delete all my socials. I said I planned on doing so. I told her I was considering staying with my brother and his wife until I could find a new place. She said she couldn’t blame me but I shouldn’t have flown out when she told me she was done with me. I said I did it because I loved her. She told me I was a fool for doing so. <br><br>I posted again with an update. I went to bed thinking this was pretty much over and there was nothing I could do. <br><br>The next morning my phone had about 50 messages from her best friend. All of the messages were links to articles about racism. There was one that stuck with me though. It was a quote from a paper titled Something’s wrong with this picture. There was a part from the paper that stuck with me. <br><br>&quot;’You want me to lie? You want me to tell you you look fine when you don’t? I can do that but I don’t think you want that. You want me to help you figure out what you need to do to look better. So each time I tell you you look bad, that’s my way of telling you this young lady this is not your best work. I’m trying to tell you that so you can go back and rethink it and come back with something good.&quot; <br><br><br>I thought about this in regards to my relationship and my post. I decided I needed to rethink my last post and come back with something better. <br><br>I messaged her that I thought we could talk without her best friend. She messaged back that she was done with me and I needed to realize that. She called me a racist. I told her I wasn’t and that I was sorry if my last post upset her. I asked her to read my new post because I would like to clear the air. She said she wasn’t going to do that but she would talk to me. <br><br>We talked and I said racism is systemic. It’s interwoven into the foundation of our society and pretty much every society. Police are more likely to pull over a black man than a white man because black people commit crimes at a much higher rate. They commit more crimes because they have less access to resources. They have less access to resources because they are black and systemic racism. Because they have less resources they commit more crimes. You can trace all of this back to our country not treating black people as human beings. This lead to black people getting less access to resources. Then we as a country pretty much ignored the fact that the playing field was tilted against them. <br><br>She asked me if I believe black people are more prone to crime. I said yes. She said all black people? I said yes. She said so that means you think I’m more prone to crime because I’m black. I said yes. <br><br>She said how can you think I’m a criminal? I said I didn’t think she was a criminal. She asked how I could think she was prone to crime. I said because she was black. She said being black doesn’t make someone more prone to a crime. I said it did because of systemic racism. <br><br>She said black people commit crimes at a higher rate because they are targeted more. I said that was only part of it. Much of it was because black people were treated as second class citizens. <br><br>She said I was racist. I asked her why. She said because I wouldn’t admit black people weren’t more prone to crimes. I said they were but it’s not because they’re black. <br><br>She told me to stop. I said she was being close minded. She said I was calling her a criminal because she was black. <br><br>I said I wasn’t saying all black people are criminals. I was saying because of systemic racism black people had less access to resources and therefore committed more crimes. I said she wasn’t a criminal. She was a great person. But on average black people committed more crimes. <br><br>That’s when she said she needed to get off the phone before she said something she’d regret. I said okay and that I’d talk to her later. I had considered calling her friends and family but after this I decided I’d wait until we talked again. <br><br>I think I may have come off the wrong way. I really love this woman and I don’t think she is prone to crime. I also don’t think the average black person is a criminal but on average they do commit more crimes. <br><br>I don’t know what to do. I want this to work but I think my point may have come off wrong. How do I fix this? Should I ask her friends and family for help? Should I wait? <br><br>TLDR: I posted last night and my girlfriend (the love of my life) called me racist. I think I came off the wrong way. How do I fix this with the least amount of pain?