My girlfriend (28F) of 18 months asked her ex (30M) to be with her for a day, and I (33M) feel betrayed by her request even though she didn't go through with it.

I (33M) have been dating a woman (28F) for 18 months. She is from Germany, I'm from Australia, and we're in a long-distance relationship. We're planning for her to move to Australia and for us to live together at the end of this year.<br><br>She grew up in Germany, went to University in France, and has lived in the US, Singapore, and now Japan. We met in Japan where I work, and where she works for a German company.<br><br>In April 2023 my girlfriend went back to Germany for 2 months to stay with her family. Prior to her going back to Germany, we stayed together at my place in Japan. The day before she was about to fly back I asked her if she feels there's anything in our relationship we need to talk about. She responded by saying: <br><br>"I want to ask you for something, and you can say no and I will completely understand. In the last 2 months I lived at your place in Tokyo and now I'm going to live at my parent's place. And the last time I lived at my parent's place was with my ex. So I want to ask you if I can spend the day with him? Not to have sex, just to see him again, and I told him the same thing. And you can say no."<br><br>I responded by saying: <br><br>"I feel like we live completely different lives. For me, if I go back to Australia, I will live with my parent's, I won't live with my ex or any friends I used to have. But I will say yes to spending a day with your ex, because I know you aren't in love with him, and I know you want to be with me."<br><br>She said: <br><br>"I'm not in love with him, I want to be with you and no one else."<br><br>I said: <br><br>"If things get awkward or you're going to feel weird or bad, don't do it. But if you need to do it, I won't stop you. Because I trust you completely. I want to say no because I don't want you to do anything with your ex, but I want to say yes so you feel like you have your freedom to do whatever you want to do."<br><br>She said: <br><br>"I don't want to do it anymore. Because you said yes, I feel bad."<br><br>She went back to Germany in April and we spoke the whole time she was there. She never saw her ex or did anything with him. She said she never felt so close to me until then, and even though we're in a long distance relationship, it felt like we were together.<br><br>The issue is that when she asked me if she could spend a day with her ex-boyfriend, I felt like she betrayed me. I trusted her completely, and trusted her even more after she told me that she didn't want to do it anymore and that she felt bad. But her asking me still hurt me, and I don't know how to work past it. She feels like everything is fine, and that her asking me wasn't a big deal, but I still feel pained by her request.<br><br>How would you feel if your partner asked you if they could spend the day with their ex?