The new Taylor Swift album is trash, and you know it.

It's so mature of all you Swifties to unanimously agree that the new album is perfect. I know your lone brain cell is working overtime to find all the 'easter eggs' and connections between every badly written lyric, and I know your gay ass is working overtime to defend her honour. <br><br>But deep down, you know 'Midnights' is a bullshit, lazy cash grab that lacks any of the cleverness or originality of her earlier work. <br><br>Swift still has a modicum of talent - 'Anti-Hero' and 'Lavender Haze' are passable at the very least - but the rest of the album is a snooze fest of samey, soulless bullshit. This is the soundtrack to a 14 year old girl's sleepover that nobody wants - not even at 2AM when the wine is starting to run out.<br><br>But you know what? You're not going to admit it. You're going to lap up the TaylorSwift PR machine and convince yourself that it's actually good. You're going to convince people that Taylor could sneeze on a piece of paper and it would be a deeply personal, emotional, and LGBTQ+ empowering ballad.<br><br>I'm not calling you idiots or anything - but I am calling your taste in music shit.