The previous tenant of my new flat left a survival guide. I might need some help.

How do I kill a man?<br><br>I'm not a killer. I've not even been in a proper fight before, unless you count that time I was mugged and then beat the crap out of my karate class punching bag until I broke it. <br><br>But I am going to have to learn to kill a man, and it's all because of my flat's survival guide. <br><br>I moved in on Monday. I was given a chipped enamel key by the landlord, along with a note that was aggressively dog-armed. It wasn't very pleasant to read, so I've transcribed the relevant parts here. <br><br>* Mr. Prentice is a Very Nice Gentleman and a Quiet Tenant, so leave him alone and don't go around *talking* about him. <br>* You will note that the Weather Forecast is pinned to the board in the front hallway. Please ensure that you familiarise yourself with the forecast and plan accordingly. If you fail to plan for the weather, you will run into Mr. Prentice and he will be annoyed. <br>* If a man taps on your window at 3.33 am, do not look at him or speak to him. If you look at him or speak to him, *you're in trouble*. <br>* Do not open the fridge at midnight, or you will regret it. <br>* The lift breaks down on Tuesdays and Thursdays. If you are claustrophobic, do not ride the lift on Mondays, Wednesdays or Fridays. <br>* If you notice a burning smell coming from the heating vents, do not panic and do not phone the fire service. It's probably fine. <br>* If the fire alarm sounds, do not investigate the cause unless you have a gas mask. <br>* Do not go into the shed. <br>* Do not go into the loft. <br>* Do not go into the cellar. <br>* Do not go into the abandoned flat on the 3rd floor. <br>* Do not go outside at night unless you *must*. <br>* If you notice anything odd, do not stay alone in the flat. Stay with a neighbour, and phone a friend. <br>* If things get too much, consider moving. <br><br>Thank you. <br><br>Ian<br><br>I laughed and tore the note up. I've moved before, been given a list of quirks and rules and warnings. People were funny about their houses. I was distracted by the horror of moving into my first flat, the exhaustion of the big move and the excitement of starting my new life, so I barely thought about the note at all. <br><br>That was until I put my head down and fell fast asleep, being a Very Tired Girl. <br><br>There was a tap at the window. <br><br>I groggily sat up and rubbed my eyes, reaching for my phone to check the time. <br><br>It was 3.33 am. <br><br>I fell out of bed and ran to the large window that overlooked the back garden. <br><br>It was tapped again. <br><br>I shimmied out of the window and onto the fire escape and pulled myself up to the level above before I was really aware of what I was doing. <br><br>A man looked out of the window. <br><br>He was...I don't know, old. Old as the hills. Old as time. His face looked like it had never been young. It was lumpy and wrinkly and grey, and bulbous blue veins sat on top of his skin. His teeth were too big and too white and far too sharp, and his wrinkly lips were pulled back into a wide, delighted grin. <br><br>I gasped. <br><br>He beckoned to me.