I'm going to be a high school English teacher. I hate reading.

Hello, all. I'm new to this chamber, and I'm currently in my early twenties. I'm in a bit of a sticky situation, and I'm seeking some advice. I know, I know. This is a bit of a long post, but please hear me out. I'm going to try to be as clear as possible. <br><br>I've wanted to be a high school English teacher for as long as I can remember, but the truth of the matter is that I *hate* reading. I've always felt like a hypocrite because of it, and it's something that I've always kept to myself. <br><br>I absolutely love teaching, and I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I'm in the *right* profession. I love interacting with my students. I love the feeling of accomplishment I have at the end of each day. I love being a positive influence on my students and helping them realize their potential. I love teaching them valuable life skills that go beyond the curriculum. I love teaching, and I'm very good at it. I've always been headstrong, stubborn, and determined. I, like many people, hate failing at anything. <br><br>It's just that... I really, really hate reading. I hate it. I can't stand it. <br><br>When I was in high school, I was homeschooled. I was homeschooled due to bullying, not religion, so please bear with me. I did all of my schoolwork on a computer. I think I had one or two real textbooks, and that was it. From my junior year onward, I did all of my work on a computer, and that included English. I did have to read physical books for some assignments, but I could always count on a digital copy of the book to be available. Or, you know, I could just cheat and ask Google to write a summary for me. I almost always did. <br><br>Long story short, I didn't read a single assigned book in high school. Not one. I didn't read a single book until I was 24 years old. I graduated high school at 17, and I didn't read my first book until I was an adult. I graduated college with a B.A. in English, where I *still* didn't read a single assigned book. I just didn't. I relied on Cliff's Notes and steal study guides to get me through. I still graduated with a 3.5 GPA, too, so I wasn't entirely stupid, I guess. I didn't start reading until recently, and I've read about three books on my own. I enjoyed them, too, but I'm still... not a fan of reading. <br><br>Now, I know what you're all thinking, and believe me, I get it. I'm a hypocrite. I know. I'm, like, the ultimate hypocrite. And I know that I'm not the first person in this situation, either. There are tons of teachers who hate their subject, and I know that. I've seen tons of threads, similar to this one, all over Chambers, and those threads haven't really been very inspiring, to put it mildly. And, yes. I know that I chose the *wrong* profession, and I should've chosen a different career. Believe me when I say that I know that. I know it, I get it, whatever. <br><br>But here's the thing... I really, really do love teaching. I love interacting with my students. They inspire me. I've always wanted to be a teacher. I know that it's a bit cliché, but it's the truth. I love those kids. I've spent my entire life in school, and I've always had this burning passion to be a teacher. I love my students. I love my coworkers. I love my school. I *love* being a teacher. I'm not being sarcastic, nor am I being overly dramatic. I know that I'm in the right profession. I know I am, and I know I made the right decision. <br><br>But, well... I hate reading. I hate it. And I know that I have to change, for the sake of my students. I know. I just don't know *where* to start. I feel really, really dumb, to be honest. Many of my colleagues have asked me for book recommendations, and I've always been, uh, stumped. It's, uh, a bit embarrassing, to be honest. I know I need to change, especially if I want to teach high school English like I've always wanted to. I know that I need to read the curriculum, especially *Romeo and Juliet.* I know that I need to stop being such a baby. I know that. I know I have to change, I know I have to grow up, and I know that I have to quit feeling so... embarrassed. I know I need to stop caring about feeling like a hypocrite, like a phony. And, more than anything, I need to stop lying to myself. <br><br>So, how should I start? Where should I start? I want to help my students, and I want to help myself. I know it's all about mindset, and I know it's all about attitude. I need to quit feeling so embarrassed, I need to quit feeling so stupid, and I need to quit being so stubborn. I know. I just need to grow up, especially since I'm almost thirty, now. I know I'm not the *first* person in this situation, and I know I'm not the *last* person, either. But I need some advice, and I'm positive that you all can help me. I just know it. <br><br>So, where should I start? How should I start? I've been stuck in this situation for years, and I don't want to be in this situation anymore. I don't want to be this person anymore. I want to grow, I want to change, and I want to be a great teacher. I want to be a great, inspiring teacher, and I want to inspire my students to read more. I want to inspire my students to do *everything* more, and I want to better myself. I want to be the best person I can be, and I want to be the best teacher I can be. I want to help my students, I want to help myself, and I want to change. I know it's all about attitude, I know it's all about mindset, and I just know that I have the power to change. And, yes, I know I'm not the first person in this situation. I'm not the first person, and I'm not the last person. I just want to better myself. I want to be the best teacher I can be, and I want to inspire my students. I want to help my students, I want to help myself, and I want to be a better person. I know I have to stop feeling so embarrassed, I know that I have to stop feeling so stupid, and I know I need to just... grow up. I know. I just need some advice, and I know you all can help me. I just know it. I know I'm not alone, and I know I'm not the only person in this situation. Many, many, many teachers hate their subject, and, well, here I am. Here I am, and I'm ready to change. I want to better myself, and I want to help myself. I know I need to stop feeling so stupid, I know I need to stop being so stubborn, and I know I have to change. I know I have to stop feeling so embarrassed, I know that I have to stop feeling like a hypocrite, and I know I have to be honest with myself. I just know it. <br><br>Also, please be kind. I know I'm a bit of a hypocrite, and I know I'm being a bit dramatic, but, well, please be kind. I really, really do need your help, and I know you all can help me. Thank you!