How do I get my girlfriend to knock off this annoying habit?

I have a great girlfriend. Maybe it's even too good to be true. But honestly, if I had a dollar for every time my friends told me that I was really punching above my weight with her, I'd have a lot more dollars.<br><br>So, sure, there has to be something wrong with her somewhere, right? And it's not like I'm complaining, but she has this one quirk, this one annoying habit, that she just won't stop. It's honestly not a big deal, it's just one of those things that gets on your nerves, you know?<br><br>See, she's always just a little too good. Whenever we eat somewhere, the server always loves her and hates me. Whenever we go to the movies, she always runs into a friend who gives us free popcorn. Whenever we walk down the street, everyone smiles at her and scowls at me.<br><br>It's honestly a little embarrassing, how much people like her. Like one time I was being a bit of an ass to the guy at the coffee shop and he was being a bit of an ass back. But then I told him to make it two coffees and he asked the obligatory "what's your girlfriend like it?" And, well, I guess it was kind of embarrassing that he instantly recognized that I wasn't the one dating the supermodel.<br><br>But, you know, when he came out with our drinks he was all smiles, and he told her they were on the house. And that's when I learned she likes her coffee black.<br><br>I'm not sure if you've heard, but the best coffee is black as the night and strong as a man's will. If you need to add milk and sugar, then it's not the best.<br><br>So, yeah, she doesn't drink coffee like an adult. But I guess that's not too big of a deal, considering.<br><br>Considering what?<br><br>Considering she's my girlfriend.<br><br>I guess what I'm trying to say is that there has to be something wrong with her somewhere, right? Like maybe she's got some hidden dealbreakers. Maybe she's got a fetish for stepped-on grapes. Maybe she's secretly religious. Maybe she doesn't like oral.<br><br>I don't know, maybe one of you can help. I've heard that if you tell a woman a secret, she'll just go and tell it to all her friends. So how can I get her to stop being perfect and share a bit of her dark side? Maybe we could even share secrets, get to know each other really, really well.<br><br>Because I just can't keep on living with the constant knowledge that the most flawed thing about her is me.