My husband turns out to be a misogynistic incel :(

I need to rant about my personal situation, so I'll make it brief, but it's very relevant to this sub. My husband and I are close to divorce. We've been together for 10 years but over the past four months, I've noticed he's been saying more and more misogynistic things to me. <br><br>I've been going over our whole relationship in my mind, ever since we first met, and at first he was very respectful. It's only really been the past two years where he's been saying more obviously misogynistic things, ever since he got into a lot of right-wing media on YouTube. He's always watched history videos but over the past two years he got into right-wing politics, and obviously they are very misogynistic. I live in a country with a lot of gender equality, so at first when he started saying misogynistic things I didn't even really understand what he was saying, because I thought he meant equality feminism, when he said he hated "feminism". It took me a while to really understand that he hates women. I've been piecing together things he's said and done throughout our relationship and I'm convinced now that he's always secretly hated women, and hid it for years, going as far as to go to the hospital with me when I was getting an abortion and to go to therapy with me when my period started causing me so much pain that I couldn't work a normal job. It really disgusts me how much he lied and manipulated me. <br><br>When we first met he told me that he was apparently an "incel" for 10 years, "because he was too shy." I didn't know what "incel" even meant so I said it must have been hard for him, and he said yeah. He was very respectful of me and very caring, so I thought he was telling the truth and was an incel because he was shy, and he had outgrown it. Now however I know now that he lied and has always been a misogynist. It feels really bad and I'm angry that he's used up so many years of my life, to find out that my husband secretly hates women all along. The amount of times he was willing to help me, support me, to "empower me" as he said, as long as I was able to get a degree and a good job, where he could have a comfortable life. He even used my student loans and money to buy his own stuff, like his gaming laptop. Ugh. He's been so selfish and manipulative and I'm fucking angry and hurt about it. It feels like my whole marriage was a lie.