When I'm old and ready to go, I want to be euthanized by a veterinarian.

I picture it now. I've got what ails me, I'm getting old, my kittens have gone on, some after a while.<br><br>I find myself at the house of a kindly old veterinarian. I've never met him, not by my recollection. I look around and see a few dogs lounging about, pets being comforted by him.<br><br>He leads me to a room and I find out he's got a needle, an overdose of something to help me pass quietly. I seem to be in pain, but he gives me some morphine and I feel better, calm now. I find myself almost wanting to be comfortable. I'm thankful to be going quietly.<br><br>The vet comes over with my shot of death. I realize I'm not ready at all. I realize I want to go into the forest at my cabin, lay on my favorite walking path and lay down. I want to pass in peace. I want to pass quietly. I want to not drown or suffocate or bleed out. I want to go quietly. I want some morphine first, and to be in peace.<br><br>I'm not ready at all.<br><br>I squeeze into the vet's lab coat and then run up his shoulder, putting my face up against his cheek, just next to his temple. I realize the vet is crying. I've never seen him cry before. He's a nice man, just trying to help me. I decide to give him some head butts and purrs. I get down and find my treat bag. I roll it over to him and paw at it.<br><br>I still want to go home. I want to go to peace.<br><br>The vet lets me into his house. I find out he has a nice big house, just a wall away. I find treats on the table, and kittens everywhere. The vet's wife was a breeder some time ago, I forget for what. They've raised dogs too. They're a nice family.<br><br>I realize the vet is calling the vet's wife.<br><br>I realize I'm being placed in a towel. I'm being put in a cat carrier, but they're not screwing the top on. I'm being put in the car. I'm going home.<br><br>I realize that I've got treats on the drive home.<br><br>I'm going home. I'm going home.<br><br>I realize that I'm going home. I'm going home.<br><br>I'm at the house. I'm at the house. I get to lay in the bed. I get to lay in my bed.<br><br>I instantly fall asleep. I have no pain. I'm in a good place. I sleep.<br><br>I wake up and I'm energized. My stomach is stabilizing, I feel like I still get some pain in my joints, but I'm energized. I get to find out how a soup is made. I get an appetizer, just a liquid.<br><br>I realize I'm digesting. I realize I'm not bloated either.<br><br>I realize I'm hungry still. <br><br>I then get some chicken.<br><br>I then realize I'm not bloated.<br><br>I have a bit of an appetite, but not too much. This is good. I can make my way to the forest.<br><br>I realize I'm going out. I realize what I'm going to do. I'm going to go home.<br><br>I realize I'm being placed in a towel.<br><br>The car is nice. I realize I've got treats again on the drive. This is nice.<br><br>I realize I'm going home. This is home. I'm going home to this forest.<br><br>I see the pond. I see the stream. I see the walking path. I remember the moose I saw one time.<br><br>I've got the towel. This is nice. I realize this is for kittens. This is how you carry kittens.<br><br>I realize I'm a kitten again. I'm a kitten again. I get to find out what it's like to be a kitten again.<br><br>I realize that the man who is carrying me is a nice man. This is what he smells like. This is what it was like to be a kitten under a man's jacket.<br><br>I'm going home. I'm going home. I'm going home.<br><br>I see the path. I'm being placed on the path. I've got all my stuff. I've got a blanket, a pillow, and treats. I get food and water. This is nice. I'm going home.<br><br>I realize the man is walking away. This is ok. I'm going home. I realize I've got a bit of a stomach ache. I realize I've been given a bit of morphine. I'm going home.<br><br>This is what it feels like to be a kitten again. This is nice.<br><br>I realize I'm not in pain.<br><br>I realize I'm warm. I'm going home.<br><br>This is what it feels like to be a kitten again. I'm a kitten. I'm a kitten. I'm a kitten.<br><br>I go home.