Can I shoot my way out of a shoplifting charge?

I'm 20 years old and I'm a terrible shoplifter who's been caught like 4 times. I need a way out of these stupid charges that have caused nothing but misery and debt in my life. I'm going to stop shoplifting from now on but I need to get out of these damn charges. I've decided that I should shoot the judge in the fucking face with a Glock pistol to get out of these charges. I plan to bring my Glock 19 gen 5 with me in a bag when I go to court. I plan to pull out my Glock and shoot the judge in the head and then use the pistol to make my escape. I'm planning to run like hell out of the courtroom and blast my way out of the courthouse.