When I blink, I see another world. I want to escape it.

I don't know when this phenomenon started but I'm almost sure it was after I had a car accident. I'm not sure. I know it's been years. I've been thinking a lot about it. I'm not sure how I've been living this long with this happening, but I've been living softly, just going through the motions.<br><br>When I say I see another world when I blink, I mean it. It's like... have you ever watched a movie and they show a flash to another scene softly. It's like that. I blink, I see it. It's incredibly quick. All I've ever seen was white and gray spaces, cube-like. I would see blurred faces of people, shyly turning away from me, like I'm a stranger there. It's an urgent feeling that I had to get back, to blink again. But I'd want to stay. It was nicer than my life. It's cleaner. It's so... clean. All I ever saw was those blurred faces and the spaces.<br><br>Once, I would say, the flashes stopped. Just stopped. I could stay there, I could keep blinking, and nothing would happen. I stayed there for days. I saw a home. A small flat. But it was nicer than any flat I've ever seen. All the furniture was cube-like, in a modernist style. I didn't see anyone, but I could hear faint sounds, like a radio playing in the background. I could also see the outside, landscapes of mountains and seas, but I want to say it was fake, like a painting.<br><br>I knew I had to get back home and I didn't want to. But it softly came back, just when I was thinking of it. I'm sure of it. It softly came back, like those flashes. I blinked and it was back.<br><br>I want it to stop. It's hard. It's hard going through life, I want to escape it.<br><br>I don't know what to do. I don't know if this is a psychological condition or something else. I've never told anyone about this, I've kept it deep inside. I don't know. I know it's getting harder, I want to escape it.<br><br>I don't know. I don't know if anyone can help me. But I think writing this softly makes me better. Thank you.