If you have to say “I’m an asshole” before doing something, you shouldn’t do it.

I’ve heard this in a LOT of different situations. I think first and foremost it comes off kind of defensive - like “I’m not an asshole, i’m about to do something you don’t like but i’m giving you a warning, because I’m not an asshole.”<br><br>I think that people like this either only feel comfortable doing something shitty when the other person has nothing to say about it, or they feel like giving the warning makes them seem like a better person. Newsflash, giving someone a warning that you’re about to act like an asshole and then acting like an asshole doesn’t make you less of an asshole. It makes you seem like you know you’re doing something wrong and you’re still doing it. It also kind of pushes responsibility onto the other person, like “hey, I warned you, I’m about to do something you aren’t gonna like and that’s against the rules, so you need to stop me before I do it.” <br><br>If you tell a friend “I’m gonna be an asshole here, but [insert thing here]” that’s a good way to lose a friend. If you tell an interviewer “I’m an asshole, but [insert question]?” That’s a good way to not make it past the interview process.<br><br>There shouldn’t be a place in any interaction you have with anyone where you have to tell them you’re an asshole. If you feel like you have to tell someone that you’re an asshole before doing something, just don’t do that thing. The only time you should ever have to say “I’m an asshole” is when you’re admitting to having done something shitty and you want to make it clear that you shouldn’t have done that and you won’t do it again, or when you tell a new friend “I’m an asshole. I get more asshole-ish as I get to know people, so bear with me, and feel free to let me know when I’ve crossed a line.”