The most important thing for my language skills has been… having a gf that couldn’t speak English

So I’m a Belgian who lives in Belgium, apparently about 90% of us speak English fluently. My Dutch (it’s actually Flemish but nobody knows the difference) has been mostly perfect since I was 5. I had a goodish level of English and German, but I wanted more. So I… started learning Spanish. <br><br>I did Duolingo for a whole year and I learned some basic phrases, vocabulary, etcetera, but not really that much. Last year I had an epiphany of sorts: I’d be much more motivated if my motivation would be love. <br><br>I started going to a dance school in a city that’s mostly French-speaking. I met a (half) French girl there and after a few months we started dating. We were exclusive for about 6 weeks before I managed to get her to let me try to say a few things in French to her. <br><br>So she said something in French, and I said “I didn’t understand that” in French. And then she switched to English and told me what she’d just said. I basically did that for a few weeks, and my French got about 10 times better every day. We’ve now been together for half a year, and I’ve been able to have 3 hour conversations in French with her friends. Heck, I’ve seen French people be impressed about how good my French is. <br><br>Now, lots of people would say that the best way to learn a language is to move to a country where that language is spoken. But even if you live there, you can still wish for a million different things that will stop you from learning all that much. If you have a reason to talk to people in a different language, it matters a lot less where you are or who you are. <br><br>If I’d moved to Spain I’d have met other English speakers and I’d have spoken a lot of English. If I stayed in Belgium, I’d have still been able to hang out with English speakers. I’d have still been able to have some conversations with people in Spanish, but I’d have never really needed to. <br><br>But because I liked a girl I HAD to learn the language she spoke. <br><br>Also, my gf is now also learning Dutch. We have a rule that we speak French to each other in France and Dutch in the rest. <br><br>So, if you want to learn a language, pick a language that you like, then find a person that speaks that language and try to date it. It’s the best way to learn a language. <br><br>This is my take on something that Chomsky once said in an interview: “If you want to learn a language, go out and buy yourself a girlfriend from that country. Nothing will motivate you more than jealousy and love.”