AITA for ruining my wife's birthday dinner by telling her father he can't pay for my dinner.

My father in law has been paying for everything that I have bought for my wife since we started dating. I've been so confused why she would need a handbag or a pair of shoes that costs over 2k dollars. So after inquiring why she needs all of these expensive things. She told me that her father wanted her to live a certain life and that he wanted her to be treated like a princess. I was confused even more when I heard her tell me we don't need to worry about paying for it because her father will pay for it. <br><br>Her father has paid for everything I have bought for her. Sometimes he would question if she really needs it but I think he wants to be percieved as this amazing dad so he constantly just pays for everything. <br><br>For her birthday I planned to take her to a expensive restaraunt. Her father asked me if he could pay for this one. I didn't want to make her birthday weird and ruin the moment by telling my father in law that he can't pay. He insisted and I told him he can't pay for this one. He asked why not we've been doing this for months? <br><br>I told him my wife has to learn a day that I pay for her and can't rely on him at all times to pay for her. So I said lets stop allowing her to be treated like a princess, I think you need to stop spoiling her. Her father was so mad at me for saying that. <br><br>Her birthday was completely ruined because she told me how I embarrassed her with my words and that is completely unacceptable to make her birthday about me. I feel like an asshole for hurting her birthday and ruining it. AITA?<br><br>Edit: Wow this got a lot more attention then I thought it would. I appreciate so many responses. <br><br>To answer a few questions that were brought up. <br><br>1. I made about 60k last year. <br><br>2. If I had a magic pen to make money I would. Her father doesn't like me very much to give me money nor would I accept it. He thinks I'm a loser but my wife loves me so there isn't anything he can do. I can't just make more money. I wish it was that easy. <br><br>3. How can she not know I'm paying for everything? <br><br>The answer is she does know. Her father has told her he doesn't want to pay for anything. That I'm paying for everything and he really doesn't like the fact that I'm spending my money on her to spoil her. <br><br>4. He thinks he's amazing for paying for everything. He brags about paying for everything. Even if he didn't pay for it he would still brag about it. I've asked my wife about him bragging about paying for everything has she ever considered he could be lying. She has since he doesn't have the best track record of telling the truth. He has to lie to make himself look good and has had a long history of lying about stupid shit. <br><br>5. I don't want her to have money she has to earn it herself. <br><br>I have no problem with her going back to school to become a doctor but she refuses to do that. <br><br>6. Why can't I give her money to pay for everything? <br><br>I'm living paycheck to paycheck. I have no savings so I don't make enough money to give her money. I can't even afford to get an apartment. I'm living in a shared house.