I'm drunk and I want my Dad back.

I'm a 26 year old married mother of 2. I had a great childhood and we had a lot of fun. Things go darker when I was 13 my dad got really sick and almost died. After a lot of treatments he did survive and went back to his whole self, but only briefly. He was on and off sick for the next 5 years. Things felt like they were getting better for the next 2 years. Then he died a year ago tonight. I was a Daddy's Little Girl, and now hes gone and I'm in a lot of pain. I have a great husband and understand that I'm blessed, but why was he taken from me? I understand I will see him again. I just want to have him back, but I can't. I miss him so much. No one will ever love me like he did, and I want to hug him so much and hear his voice, but he's gone.