Romantic love IS a choice

I hate the “sometimes love just dies” mindset. It makes romance something that’s outside of the couple’s control and to me it sends the message that once a relationship has hit a few bumps in the road, the couple is justified in ending it. <br><br>I think there is always a choice to be made, even if it’s each person choosing to love themselves more than the other person. It’s like saying “it wasn’t my choice that I gained weight, I just love cake more than I love exercising”. Sure. But you did make the choice to eat more cake than you exercised. You still made a choice.<br><br>This is probably also influenced by the fact that I’m a Catholic who believes that marriage is for life, but it is 100% each person’s choice to love their partner more than they love themselves. That is what marriage is. I’m not saying it’s always easy, and I’m not saying that one sided relationships are worth staying in, but I think the mindset of putting in effort to stay in love should be way more popular than it is.<br><br>EDIT: I am NOT saying abusive relationships (physical, sexual, or emotional) should/ can be saved by romantic love. I know that in many cases the relationship cannot be salvaged. I’m talking about relationships that have just become stale or one person wants the other to change.<br><br>EDIT 2: I am NOT saying that a person can only choose to put effort into the relationship if the other person does. But I do think relationships are a two way street.