My wife won’t stop trying to make me touch her down there

So I (m43) met my wife (f41) 10 years ago. We were both in our 30s and married at the time, though we were both in the process of divorces. I had two kids, 12 and 15 daughters, and she had 3, 20 year old son, 18 year old daughter and a 5 year old daughter. <br><br>My ex wasn’t the best woman, I won’t get into details but when we divorced I got primary custody and she didn’t fight for it. <br><br>My wifes first husband cheated on her and she left him immediately. She didn’t seem to have any serious problems with him other than that. <br><br>So we met, we clicked, hit it off, fell in love. We moved in together when our divorces were finalized, we got married a few years later, and things have been great. <br><br>However, my wife is very fixated on the idea of me using my hands or fingers while we’re being intimate, specifically in her vagina. I don’t mind the occasional “ چتdown there” but she seems to want me to do this every time we’re intimate. I don’t mind, I want her to be satisfied.<br><br>The thing is my wife isn’t very satisfied with any way I do this. I think I have tried every technique I’ve seen online or in books. I once even bought her a sex toy but when I brought it out she just cried and said I was calling her a dildo. I don’t get it. I don’t think she’s a dildo. And I don’t get why she keeps pushing me to touch her in a way that doesn’t please her.<br><br>I only touched her in this way once before when I met her. I did it selfishly because I wanted to go down on her. When I did though she cried and said it hurt. I apologized and said I wouldn’t do it again, but she said it was fine and she would tell me if she wanted me to stop. I don’t get why she keeps trying to get me to touch her in a way that she doesn’t like.<br><br>Sometimes I feel like she wants to make me touch her just to call me a creep, but other times she’ll be begging me to stop or she’ll go and masturbate in the bathroom.<br><br>It’s weird, I feel like there’s a whole other dynamic there that I’m missing and it’s making me feel really confused.<br><br>&#x200B;