I feel lonely when I’m around even the people that mean the most to me.

I’m a pretty outgoing and energetic person and I have a lot of friends and a big extended family. I have never really been alone. I have been pretty lucky with that so far. But I really feel like I have never really known what love is. No matter how close I get to someone it feels like there’s a barrier up all the time. I say this to the people closest to me and they say I’m the love of their life, but to me love means no barrier. I’ve been to therapy to see if it’s a past trauma thing but it’s nothing like that. I’m just a pretty cold person I’m realising. I don’t know how to describe it. I just feel like I’m on a completely different planet to everyone else. I have a lot of trouble forming emotional connections. I’m an INFJ, but I don’t really even feel like that’s my personality. But I’ve been tested several times and it’s always INFJ. I’m also pretty stoic. I rarely outwardly express any emotions. I’m not sure what to do. I feel like I’m floating through life. I’m not upset about it at all. I just feel… empty. Like when I die I’ll be gone and that’ll be it. And I don’t have a problem with that. I’m fine with that. I just wish I could feel a true connection like everyone else. It’s not that I don’t like people, I do. I love people. Everyone intrigues me. I love hearing people’s stories and talking about life. But I just can’t connect. And I don’t know what to do about it.